# of watchers: 10
2012-12-05 [I'm gone.]: Sign me in please!
2012-12-06 [I'm gone.]: Yay i entred!
2012-12-08 [Perfidious Fidelity]: Who is the current queen?
2012-12-09 [Stephen]: So, to clarify more, there's no current Queen. (;
2012-12-10 [I'm gone.]: Ok???
2012-12-13 [Perfidious Fidelity]: Sweet lol thanks
2012-12-14 [I'm gone.]: MAY I ASK WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE?????????
2012-12-14 [Stephen]: ...?
2013-02-06 [Schlachter]: Calm down Samantha lol... life is quite liveable without a queen... unless you're not into the whole democracy fad that is...
2013-02-21 [kittykittykitty]: I can't decide! Plenty of potential in the apps :D
2013-02-21 [Schlachter]: Just 5 voters so far??? This is outrageous...
2013-02-21 [Stephen]: Also not surprising. :3
2013-02-22 [Schlachter]: Did Mort vote for himself?
2013-02-22 [I'm gone.]: Ikr...... I hope I win!!!!!!!!!!! :-D
2013-02-22 [Stephen]: No idea who voted for what, I can't tell. :P
I'm not going to close the poll til we have at least 20 voters, though. :P
2013-02-22 [Cerulean Sins]: Hopefully my wee ads on Facebook will help with the voters :-)
2013-02-22 [Schlachter]: Hopefully... if we had more active users, your good looks should be enough XD
2013-03-07 [Deg]: LOL I had one vote, where did it go!? TRAITORS! :D
2013-03-07 [Schlachter]: Yes! She did have one vote!!!
That was totally mean... :p whoever did that... probably Mort...
I promised Mort my vote; a deal is a deal... funny I'm not getting anything out of this!!!
I'm secretly hoping that [Cerulean Sins] wins so I can seduce her & then become King!
Yes... it's totally a secret now... ;D
No not really... she deserves to win.
2013-03-07 [Stephen]: I'm keeping the poll open until 20 people vote.
I mean, we have more than 200 weekly login members.. so 1/10 of that shouldn't be too hard to get. :P
2013-03-08 [GlassCasket]: quack
2013-03-08 [Schlachter]: Dude, you came back to life!!!
Evanescence should sing "Bring me to life!" for the occasion...
* Evanescence shows up band & all & starts an epic show *
"How can you see into my eyes like open doors?"
"Leading you down into my core where I've bec..."
ALRIGHT STFU WE'VE HEARD ENOUGH EMO FOR A LIFETIME GET LOST!
* does an epic kick of "This is 8 MARTAAAAAAAAA" & shoves them all down the mosh pit -- fans proceed by tearing them limb for limb & eat them up because they love them so much *
Couldn't just get to the goddamn punch line for Christs' sake...
So yes, happy 8th of March for all you NON-FEMINIST, NATURAL, FEMININE & BIOLOGICAL ladies out there! The rest of you can grab a smoke & get out of my face...
Wait... this isn't bob's diner o.0'... must delete comment... nah, couldn't be bothered.
2013-03-08 [kittykittykitty]: Ironic that I am finding out about this holiday again from a man. P.S. The butch women and cyborgs need some love too!
2013-03-08 [Deg]: I seriously didn't even know there was such a day. Ah well.
2013-03-08 [kittykittykitty]: That's because every day is women's day, amirite?
2013-03-08 [Schlachter]: The butch women & cyborgs are men. They don't need love XD
Only real women need affection & recognition. You cannot be big & butch & manly & expect affection... that's just nonsense... I mean, unless you're gay, then that's fine I mean... but you're not getting any from me XD
2013-03-08 [Schlachter]: Here, have a butcher:
It's in Russian stating "On 8th March"
You can have the picture everyday [kittykittykitty] =^.^= he would load on your PC for the rest of your life too :3 whenever you felt like it! So yes! Everyday! :3
I don't even know why we have that day... it's mostly Slavic cultures that promote it...
2013-03-08 [Schlachter]: NO!
I won't have it! There's still 7 more votes left until Stephen closes the polls & let's face it, you're just that much more prettier than Mort the troll disguised in pink! You look Queen material, he doesn't...
2013-03-08 [kittykittykitty]: Awh, he's lovely. He could stay in my PC for every women's day forever. I have a special folder for him called the Recycle Bin. I bet he likes recycling.
Comoooon voters, before [Schlachter] makes 7 clone accounts to vote for Shelly (time well spent *nod*)
2013-03-08 [Schlachter]: [kittykittykitty] :'( so cruel... he cuts meat so you can eat it! Is this how you repay him?? & he's offering you flowers!
I'll remember not to offer you romantic things in the future... hmff. Don't you dare empty it!
I am appalled! I would never do such a thing! I have morals & ethics! Besides, everyone knows it's just easier to forge the POST method for anonymous votes... uh... of course I never did it or would do it!
* runs a few POST scripts with bogus account data *
2013-03-09 [Cerulean Sins]: *giggles*
2013-03-10 [kittykittykitty]: Gifting chunks of freshly-cut meat passes for romance these days? I must be out of the loop. I'd accept the flowers, though:D
2013-03-10 [Schlachter]: [kittykittykitty] unless you're a vegetarian, whatever happened to taking a girl on a romantic date to a restaurant? & he HAPPENS to be the chef? huh, huh? Just look at that smile? & you figure it was only good for the Recycle Bin :'( oh the shame... what low standards must a man meet to win a womans' heart!
What passes for romance these days is un-inventive(?) & cliche (i.e.: communist romance) at best where everyone just copies the Hollywood movie stars -- who are PATHETIC romance models (let's face it, the only romance there is sex-based & has no platonic love involved). So I agree there... but I'm not sure it's in the direction you were seeking XD
I mean, how many girls do you know make it a living hell at least (preferably impossible) for someone to get sex out of them these days? That's right... near none. By college, every girl has gotten it in one way or another...
They all give in to the sexy muscular stereotype who just wants a notch on his belt over the probably not so good-looking alternative who would nearly give his life to be with them.
2013-03-11 [kittykittykitty]: I am vegetarian, so he'd have had more luck if he was a greengrocer. And hey you never mentioned he was a chef. I am totally DTF now. Tell him to call me? Handmade/homem
Hoes be easy cuz #yolo
2013-03-11 [Schlachter]: There is no way you're convincing me you currently live & are from anywhere in the UK. From now on I will assume you are writing to me from Nepal, Bhutan or Northern India. :p
What kind of butcher can't cook though?
Sure they can chop you up a salad as well... knives are not just for meat last I checked XD
I'll have Putin send him over as a mail-order... well... March 8th "present" XD he's apparently giving out Russian passports for French tax evasion, so why not.
What if the hoes are easy for another reason? o.O' like STD's? #oloy much?
2013-03-16 [kittykittykitty]: But can he chop a salad like this?!
Yah English folks love their meat. I'll go eat my vegetables with the Buddhists, where yolo does not apply.
2013-03-16 [Schlachter]: Probably if you ask him VERY nicely. I am certain he can do nanometer precision slicing with his agility(?). But even if he did, I mean... you wouldn't eat it or be grateful & claim it is a work of art & not food.
That, I learned the hard way. Yes, you go do that. If they even accept you... most Buddhists are racist & don't like white people tainting their religion. They will not tell you that though... they will just send you off to the middle of nowhere & leave you there.
2013-03-16 [sammie h!]: Ahh, 3 votes, that's all I will get lol.
2013-03-17 [Schlachter]: I don't think we'll ever get 20 voters honestly...
2013-03-18 [kittykittykitty]: Mr Butcher pleases the ladies. What can't he do?! Of course I would eat it. What better way to destroy a work of art. That's why it's made out of food :D
Are they really? Buddhists always sounded so nice. I'll go and eat my vegetables alone in my bedroom then :*( I will cut them into flower shapes just to feel special.
18 votes now. That's like 3 votes in the last 2 days!
2013-03-18 [Schlachter]: I am sure he can't skateboard or do any of those modern retarded tricks kids do these days. He probably doesn't know how to read or write... wait no, he does, he probably has a PhD from Leningrad University since he would be from the USSR. Probably forgot how to read & write right after its collapse though... he probably can speak English better than me, too :/ without an accent. But those flowers are clearly from the heart? Is that not what matters?
Well, you could let the food rot... or get consumed by nature somehow? Rotting things smell, but they can be beautiful too...
Of course they are! Wise people either lead or manipulate... if they're not leading, they're manipulating when they interact with people. I rarely catch any Buddhists leading anyone anywhere. They keep all the wisdom to themselves... so that's how you know.
You would cut your vegetables?? & waste them just to make yourself feel special??? You destroy life to defile it into shapes just to please yourself...??? You might as well eat meat... imagine a 30 meter tall Venus fly trap(?) using its vines to twist & contort you into shapes after it poisoned you for its dining pleasures? You wouldn't like that would you...? Better just get eaten as-is no? Just eat the damn vegetables & be happy you have food on the table :3
GOD DAMMIT! Why is it MY vote that is making the difference between Mort & Shelly! Someone PLEASE make the difference 2 or greater! I want to be Switzerland here, Scheisse verdammt!
2013-03-18 [sammie h!]: I still think Mort has numourous accounts and that means more votes but that also means Breaking the rules, that's how he got 6 votes. :)
2013-03-18 [GlassCasket]: vagina
2013-03-18 [Schlachter]: No... he wouldn't do that... he wouldn't...
I SWEAR if he did that I will retract my vote for him! I don't approve of smoking Queens... but Shelly is much better than to CHEAT!!! YOU HEAR ME MORT!?
2013-03-19 [Schlachter]: [sammie h!], you forgot to adjust the time (16:52:35 comes before 16:58:43)... also, it seems the posts' time isn't changing. How sad. I should REALLY impersonate a comment from you (no not the Mort hack, that one's easy & depends on whether the wiki is exported or not)... but I'd like to think I'm more mature than that.
2013-03-19 [Cerulean Sins]: Everyone should chill this contest is for fun and a laugh.
2013-03-19 [sammie h!]: Lol, we are having jokes
2013-03-19 [Schlachter]: WHERE'S MORT! Please come back Mort... I'm sorry :'(
2013-03-19 [Deg]: Who is everyone!? Two people does NOT equal everyone. Besides they're just bein' silly. Lol
2013-03-19 [sammie h!]: Yeah, we love been Goofy, isn't it what this site is about lol? :)
2013-03-19 [Schlachter]: Hayyyy! I was NOT goofing around... That was Sammie...
I was just reciting the play for Lady MacBeth (Shelly) when she will become Queen.
2013-03-19 [Schlachter]: Wait... how did Sammie go from 1 vote to 6??
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: Lol
2013-03-20 [Deg]: Whaaaat!?
2013-03-20 [Deg]: Lol! I'm just happy I got my 1 back.
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: Something fishy is going on here o.o'
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: How many accounts do you have -.-'?
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: 1. :)
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: But you know other people's passwords then...
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: Nope, it has all been done by not breaking any rule, no clone houses, no sharing of passwords, no begging for votes for me. :)
2013-03-20 [kittykittykitty]: It's so inconceivable that sammie could get 5 votes?:D
2013-03-20 [Deg]: No, not at all! Just so quickly, all at once...! LOL
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: That's because I did what I was asked to do, get people to vote, so I did, I got 2 today.
2013-03-20 [Deg]: Nice! Well, either way, it was a good run! :D
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: It was... Shelly won :3
ALL HAIL TO LADY MACBETH ELFPACK!!!
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: Lol, let's hope that know droid was used. Lol
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: I voted for Mort (as promised) & I only got one vote... so Shelly won hands down here!
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: So he asked you which breaks the rules?
2013-03-20 [Cerulean Sins]: What rules?
There aren't any rules stating that you can't beg for votes or use clone houses for votes. Those rules where used in the last Queen of Elfpack contest but not used in this one. If they where used then it would be stated in the rules section on this page. It is only common sense not to vote for yourself, not to use clone houses nor to beg for votes.
[Schlachter] only promised his for to Mort because he believed that Mort would be a good Queen of EP just like those 5 voters believed in you, [sammie h!]. You may not known that they promised you votes but once they voted for you they truly believed in you and promised you his or her vote.
2013-03-20 [**Yummy**Mummy**]: Sammie just admit defeat and bow down to your queen no rules were broken actually i think i was the one person who voted to spite you! GET OVER IT!
2013-03-20 [**Yummy**Mummy**]: yes,your majesty! *puts kettle on* xxx
2013-03-20 [Cerulean Sins]: Yay! Love you Rach! *blows kisses* xxxx
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: It doesn't spite or bother me at all, It was a joke, that's why it said lol on the end, I new you ([**Yummy**Mummy**]) would vote for [Cerulean Sins] anyway, as your her friend, and saying you only voted to spite me is like saying that you didn't vote for her because she is your friend at all, that you just did it to get at me, which didn't work at all.
to tell you the truth I new Michelle was going to become Queen as she is well known and well behaved and helps out a lot on Elfpack and is a good lass so she deserves it.
2013-03-20 [Cerulean Sins]: I thought Mort was going to win lol
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: I did but I didn't want him to ha ha, you reign supreme as the Elfpack Queen. :)
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: I thought Mort would win too... but he's not on much anymore. I did believe he would make a good Queen... but I was wrong since he's not paying much attention to anyone anymore. He's better at playing the role of an entertainer honestly...
Though I am glad you won Shelly... I haven't met a soul who doesn't speak good of you! Congrats!
I'm not good at this type of speech, but here goes:
[sammie h!] & [**Yummy**Mummy**] There's no need to fuss over this... if there were no rules about those things, then there were no rules. [sammie h!] could use a little more tweaking on her social side regarding annoying behavior, but voting out of spite against someone? Really? That's not very nice... it's not wrong, but certainly hurtful I would think. Especially to mention it in public. I don't think you enjoy hurting people Rachael, you're a good person. I know a lot of people have grudges with Sammie, but let's try to give her a fair chance instead of always giving her a cold shoulder? Maybe? I'm sure she can be good too...
I apologize if I did say anything out of place, I was poking fun all along because let's face it... Elfpack does not seem to be getting much attention as of late, & I have been getting slightly busier... so I figure a little humor might liven things a little...
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: RIGHT & back to the routine:
So... uh... where's the Queen's palace?
2013-03-20 [sammie h!]: Thanks [Schlachter] I'm used to it now, members can give me the cold shoulder all they like, I will still be nice to them as it won't bother me anymore, back when i was a normal member I would of Lost my temper but now, no, as it doesn't solve anything and lets the other person win.
I am not trying to kick up a fuss or anything, I just thought there would have been them rules, but if there isn't, then why kick up a fuss in the first place, I am not bothered, I'm more than Happy that Shelly is Queen, she will be a good one, I have known her since I started out on [Hedda]'s sites and I can say the same thing, I have not heard one person say anything wrong about her.
I do everything I can to get people to come to Elfpack, I Or [matty coppick] tweet Elfpack on Twitter or Broadcast it on Blackberry messanger but not many adds come from it, Matts got over 1,000 followers on Twitter, and still not many adds. so I don't know what to do accept keep trying
2013-03-20 [Cerulean Sins]: Aww thanks [Schlachter] and I have no idea where my palace is....perhaps the moon?
[**Yummy**Mummy**] is a lovely person and my BBF. And....to be honest I can't defend what she said other than that's Rachael and she is a loving bitch LOL! (Love you Rach when you read this!) Xxxxx
2013-03-20 [**Yummy**Mummy**]: lol my bad didnt mean to flick up the mud! p.s i will actually make you a coffee this timeinsted of saying i will then not lol xxx
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: Well, Sammie, keep up the good work people are bound to start appreciating eventually...
You're more than welcome milady & I am quite sure Rachael is just as wonderful as you say she is as that would be the least for her to make it as your BBF.
Let's go take the Buckingham Palace from the Queen of England maybe? Or better the Versailles palace?
I need some place to create trouble so that there is justification for a tyrant...
2013-03-20 [Cerulean Sins]: Ehhhh.....I don't want the Queen house. I want a Scottish Castle and the throne from Game Of Thrones :-)
2013-03-20 [**Yummy**Mummy**]: sure but a cuppa now would be nice! how about edinburgh castle or something much more michelle! xxx
2013-03-20 [Cerulean Sins]: Yeah! I want Edinburgh Castle! :-) xxxx
2013-03-20 [Schlachter]: Alright... we should besiege them all!
So... how about a flag to go with the bullets, cannons & war machines? National colors? Teutonic Knights with plasma guns should do the trick for infantry... we should probably create an enlisting post for the army... & the special Queen's guards (no Sammie, no privileges there other than dying for the Queen XD) should be selected.
2013-03-22 [kittykittykitty]: Giffiepets infantry reporting for duty your highness
2013-03-22 [sammie h!]: Come on, I'm waiting for my color rights lol. :0
2013-03-22 [Schlachter]: Chainguns are useless in this strategy... All guns look like penises, don't think it was an accident...
We NEED plasma guns:
Ze prototype in action in hell:
It washes out all life forms without damaging buildings :3 we don't want a scratch on the palace!
2013-03-22 [sammie h!]: lol. :)
2013-03-22 [kittykittykitty]: Oh... ahh... hmm... I did not consider the precious castle walls. I maaaay have already grafted the chain gun onto his shell. Just a little bit inseparable. There is only one solution: he will fill it with paint balls, and be in charge of the castle decoration instead.
There we go... Much more suited to the little guy's talents.
2013-03-22 [Schlachter]: Nein! Nein! Nein! This is not serious...
How do you expect to chase out top guns from their lair with paint & decoration?
One does not simply take over Buckingham Palace...
Wait... I see what you did there :> you want to flood the palace with envious women :3. Well, you are going to have to pick a less hermaphroditic fiend here to do the task of painting the place green with jealousy...
2013-03-22 [GlassCasket]: Maybe they're allergic to rainbows? O.o
2013-03-22 [Schlachter]: Holy Schiesse! You are UP to something! But wait, then that means there are PONIES! Where there are ponies, there is Mort... MORT! Come back!
2013-03-22 [GlassCasket]: Either ponies or homophobes xD
2013-03-22 [Schlachter]: ... you lost me, what is the connection between the two?
2013-03-22 [Cerulean Sins]: My iron throne shall be shipped to Edinburgh Castle and then I shall take over the world with my army of plasma guns :-)
2013-03-22 [sammie h!]: So when is the decision going to be made lol? :)
2013-03-22 [Schlachter]: Plasma guns don't shoot themselves dear... we need to raise an army... OF DOOM GUYS!
2013-03-22 [Cerulean Sins]: Or an army of white walkers :-)
2013-03-22 [Schlachter]: What is a "white walker"?
2013-03-23 [Cerulean Sins]: White walkers from Game of Thrones :-)
2013-03-23 [Deg]: Oh. That's scary!
2013-03-23 [Schlachter]: OOooooh! What can they do??
2013-03-23 [Schlachter]: Did anyone notice that Mort just adjusted his vote by one or is it just me?
2013-03-23 [Deg]: Well, I noticed now that you brought it up. XD
2013-03-23 [Schlachter]: No dignity! I will never vote for him again!
2013-03-23 [Deg]: It actually kinda sucks that he'd do that...?
2013-03-23 [Schlachter]: It doesn't matter, we all know who won... but why he is behaving like this beats me... PMS maybe? XD
2013-03-23 [kittykittykitty]: Yes somehow 2 votes crept in after I closed the poll. I had noticed. It doesn't change the result, though.
2013-03-23 [Deg]: I know it's not serious and everyone knows it was a joke, I'm personally affected nor do I care. But still seems kind of...I don't know, sneaky.
2013-03-23 [Cerulean Sins]: Not sure what White Walkers do yet, will find out in season 3 of Game of Thrones which is on at the end of this month. yay!
Wow....I didn't even notice. I don't mind sharing Queen status with Mort :-)
Right am off to work....it will be a long night at the pub lol
2013-03-23 [kittykittykitty]: They look kinda old. It might take a long time to grow a whole army of them.
2013-03-24 [Schlachter]: No, we can't have 2 queens?! That's ridiculous! Then what? Harems? Forbidden palaces guarded by eunuchs? & all castle staff castrated???
* bolts on some steel groin protection *
[Cerulean Sins]: you work at a pub? Well I figure the UK replaced most of its churches with pubs...
[kittykittykitty]: I agree. But our queen is hooked on to a mind-numbing TV series :'( I hope it will not reflect on the state of politics here...
* pulls out a deck of cards & Russian roulette guns *
yes... that would be terrible...
2013-03-24 [Cerulean Sins]: Yeah I work in a pub on weekends lol :-)
2013-03-24 [Stephen]: As the Warden, and as this is my personal contest that I host, moderate and have the final say -- in this contest I declare the winners as follows:
First place, and Queen of Elfpack: [Cerulean Sins]
Tied for second place and Runner Up(s): [sammie h!] and [Morgoth]
Prizes will be handed out by me immediately.
To the winners: Congratulation
Disclaimer: All decisions made by the Warden are made with finality; no actions or evidence can reverse this call or decision due to the nature of this contest.
2013-03-24 [GlassCasket]: I love drunk people! They're so much easier to punch than sober people!!!
2013-03-24 [GlassCasket]: Hehe Stephen just gained DM status :P
2013-03-24 [Schlachter]: [Cerulean Sins]: we can't have our queen working in a pub??
[Stephen]: good stuff! Glad to have you back... I was about to go all out Rambo...
[GlassCasket]: word? Who do you need to punch?
2013-03-24 [GlassCasket]: Drunk people!!! :D
2013-03-24 [Schlachter]: Don't you ever get drunk?
2013-03-24 [GlassCasket]: I don't intentionally ingest things that i don't need and could possibly kill/harm me. So no :D
2013-03-24 [kittykittykitty]: Does this mean we can't punch you?:(
2013-03-24 [sammie h!]: And there's kitty with the punch line lol. :)
2013-03-24 [Schlachter]: Beer also counts as harmful substance...
At least I am on cocaine & heroin... eeesh, the nerve on some people :/
2013-03-24 [Cerulean Sins]: It's fun to watch people get drunk but sometimes it can get nasty and fights normally start =/
2013-03-24 [sammie h!]: You can say that again, mat was on the doors last night at macdonalds it was his second shift and his collegues cheak bone got broke.
2013-03-25 [Schlachter]: BRAWL!!!
2013-03-25 [GlassCasket]: I'm not as easy to punch as a drunk guy!!! :D
2013-03-25 [Schlachter]: But if you get drunk then you do become easy to punch...
2013-03-25 [sammie h!]: True fact. :)
2013-03-25 [Schlachter]: In fact, you do more harm to yourself trying to harm others while drunk. You don't really have to do much other than watch & maybe trip the person XD
2013-03-25 [sammie h!]: Yeah, or walk in front of a car, the car trys to avoid you and crashes into a wall, bam, there dead.
2013-03-25 [Schlachter]: Dead is good.
2013-03-25 [sammie h!]: You wouldn't say that if you was dead ha ha ha ha ha
2013-03-25 [Schlachter]: Of course I would! People would finally leave me alone lol
RIP = Rest In Peace lol
2013-03-25 [sammie h!]: Damn, I thought R.I.P stood for Real Idiotic People lol. :)
2013-03-25 [Schlachter]: Same difference XD I mean, if they are annoyed with you, I am pretty sure they are idiotic to you lol
2013-03-25 [I'm gone.]: LOL!!!!!!!!
2013-03-25 [sammie h!]: Ha Ha. :)
2013-03-26 [Schlachter]: Samantha... you understood that joke? Or are you just happy to see me :p?
2013-03-26 [GlassCasket]: I have a ring of sustenance :D
2013-03-26 [Schlachter]: What is it, preciousssssss