Dear diary!

this is NOT my diary. and it is NOt dear. but Elftown is gone for now (why? why??) so... the show must go on, i guess... luckily, i did't sattle for creating links, but coppied all of my important works from elftown to other places, and so i saved most of them from dome. but my beautifull page.. my beautifull beautifull page... and my diary, oh, my diary... *here come the tears again* i really hope that they DID make SOME backup (don't tell me they didn't, i don't care, i don't wanna hear it!!)
i can't continue like this. i'm sorry, this doesn't feel like home. more like a very cheap substitute. an aliant environment. can't take it. sorry.

Shir.

I was here.

Not too long ago
i was still here.
sitting quietly beside you
you wouldn't let me near
you only let me listen
you only let me hear
hear you from a distance
see- but never touch
not daring to come any closer
afraid it would push you away
though there is no more away
than what you were from me
asking for more would have been asking too much.
so i just sett there,
drinking you with my eyes
hoping that by that
you might realize
but that never happened
and i too had enough
for being ivisible
is simply to tough
i had to give up
and get up and go
waited another minute
nothing happened
and so
i got on the way
you didn't see me disappear
but when you wake up
you'll know
not too long ago
i was here.

(April 29, 2005)