50 things guys wish gurls knew




We aren’t mind readers!
We are not to be used as pawns in trying to make your girlfriends jealous.
When you sleep over never boss me around in bed unless it is during sex.
Smoking is the biggest turn off.
It never hurts to work out.
If you don’t want to hear the truth, don’t ask the question.
“Fine” or “whatever” is not an appropriate ending to a conversation.
If you want sex, just ask. (In case you didn’t already know.)
Don’t expect guys to say as many sweet things as they do in the movies. (It takes a lot of guys and their wives to come up with those scripts).
Only models are able to wear most of the stuff you see in fashion magazines.
No guy will complain if he comes home and sees you in one of the following outfits: French Maid, School girl, bunny, or just plain naked.
You don’t need lingerie to look sexy before bed, short cotton shorts and a tank top are fine by us.
Girls look good naked so stop worrying.
Sharing your deepest feelings in no way guarantees reciprocity.
We are all kinky and willing to try anything that you may enjoy, just let us know.
Every so often no matter whether it is true or not remind us that we have the biggest penis you’ve ever dealt with.
If were not getting love we’ll start looking…(haha…just kidding…psych…I’m dead serious)
The greatest thing ever is to watch a girl touch herself.
Most of the time when I fantasize it is about another person.
If you, the girl, make out with another girl we won’t consider it cheating. Actually we strongly promote this behavior.
Your hair is like 14 inches long, how are we supposed to notice a quarter inch missing.
You shouldn’t be flattered or grossed out if we get an erection when dancing with you. All we need is Friction.
Porn…hmmm…Porn. Watching porn is like breathing it would just be wrong to ask us to stop.
We masturbate, usually more when we are in a relationship, can’t explain it but it is just fact.
Blue balls are not sporting equipment. Didn’t your parents teach you not to quit.
Giving head is never a bad idea.
We are conservationists at heart, water is our biggest love, so shower with us.
There are three acceptable ways to wake up: (1) You on top of us. (2) Getting head. (3) Some sort of breakfast.
We don’t mind going to gay movies with you but don’t tell our friends.
You can’t hold it against us if we cry after sports movies or “Old yeller.”
“The game is on” is an acceptable excuse to avoid any serious conversation.
Any harsh contact with the testicles should be assumed a serious injury but soft caresses are strongly encouraged.
You’re probably not as funny as you think.
Brad Pitt is probably a cool guy but if I hear one more girl say “he’s so hot” he may have to die.
Your period should be referred to as Blowjob week. (Influenced by a Maxim article)
Cooking makes a girl that much more attractive especially if she can use a grill.
You can’t get mad if we refuse to hook up your “ugly friend” with one of our friends.
For every fart that slips out when you are around we successfully hold in about 15, enduring excruciating pain to do this.
If we want to take naked pictures of you it is because we are proud and want to show you off to our friends.
The red light means the video camera is off.
A guy should be considered sensitive if he asks whether you want to do it with the lights on or off.
Whip cream and chocolate syrup are not just condiments for ice cream also Altoids just don’t make your breath fresher.
Nothing you will ever do will entitle you to operate the remote control. (Unless operating means handing it to us.)
The only thing left to be said after sex is “goodnight.”
Video games have helped us develop such finger skills that should only encourage us to play more often.
Critiquing our driving is only second to critiquing our love making.
Guys nights out are sacred events. If we answer questions we could be castrated.
If you ask us to go shopping you have to at least entertain the idea of having sex in a changing room.
The jeans don’t make your ass look fat. Your fat ass makes your ass look fat.
99.5% of the time we didn’t mean to hurt you.

.:These are the 12 signs of falling in love:.


12. You'll read his/her IMS over and over again...


11. You'll walk really really slow while you're with him/her...


10. You'll feel shy whenever you're with him/her...


9. While thinking bout him/her...your heart will beat
faster and faster...


8. By listening to his/her voice...you'll smile for no reason.


7. While looking at him/her..you cant see the other
people around you...you can only see that person...


6. You'll start listening to SLOW songs.


5. He/She becomes all you think about.


4. You'll get high just by their smell...


3. You'll realize that you're always smiling to yourself
when you think about them..


2. You'll do anything for him/her...


1. While reading this, there was one person on your mind the whole time.


Now make a wish :
post this as "these are the 12 signs of falling in love"
and something good will happen to you tonight

If you REALLY LIKE SOMEONE right now AND MISS THEM and can't get them out of your head then re-post this within 1 mintute and whoever you are missing will surprise you.

If you REALLY LIKE SOMEONE right now AND MISS THEM and can't get them out of your head then re-post this within 1 mintute and whoever you are missing will surprise you.

ok toooddaaaaaay......ummm... nothing happened. some friends suggested i should write in this to practice writing things over 15 pages since i am just a short short story person and i'd love to start a writing project...
eeep! it's SOOO bor-ing
what else? oh oh oh i stole some men's boxers from my guy friend (of course i let him know i stoled em.....) and theY ARE REALLY comfy. and cool looking.....the sentence today i really had to laugh about is when sami said: I LIKE TO DANCE IN ODD PLACES....guess what sami? ME TOO. we rock
~coco

well well well my luvs. meglynn (nickname of megan) and i were talking about the likes the someone will come to school dressed as a french maid again this year and i must say it was hil-arious to imagine some of these girls in that tiny hot topic costume. it may sound mean but really, ya gotta try it sometime. yesh yesh anyhow then megs asked me if IIII would do such a thing and i said possibly if we didn't have that idiotic dress code to go by. not that anyone follows it, tho some should cause of the body mass. *gets back on track* well megs had to go and ask some guys how they would like it if i came to school as that french maid. it was suprising how many said it would turn them on. i mean really SCARY.
lol
~coco

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A guy and girl were speeding over 100 mph on a road…




Girl:"Slow down. I’m scared."




Guy:"No, this is fun."




Girl:"No, its not. Please, its too scary."




Guy:"Then tell me you love me."




Girl:"Fine, I love you. Slow down!"




Guy:"Now give me a BIG hug."




*Girl hugs him*




Guy: "Can you take my helmet off and put it on? Its bugging me."






Paper the next day: motorcycle crashed into a building because of brake failure. Two people riding. Only one survived.






The truth:
Halfway down the road, the guy realized the brakes went out, and he didn’t want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him and felt her hug him one last time, then had her put on his helmet. So that she would live, even though it meant that he would die.

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........................ ‘’~-,,-~VICTORY WILL B MINE!!!~

o and anyone that feels obligated to say that my pictures that i'm gonna upload, suck, will also be hunted down, i have no patience with those ppl, freaks (jk)
~ivy

HELLLLOOOOOOOO, WORLD!
i'm trying to find some ppl on here and it's not working this sux. anyway, gonna try to get some pics up soon, k? don't try to stalk me or cyber me i swear i will hunt you down and kill you with a kitchen knife. I'm serious.
~ivy