[Morningstar Rising]'s diary
two of my cats died today, were put to sleep casue they ate car oil. By the time the Vet saw them it was to late to help them. Had to put them to sleep. Its so sad. I loved them so much. All I can do is cry.
TO ALL MY FRIENDS
A Poem I found on the net
FRIENDS ARE LIKE ANGELS
Our friends are like angels,
.....who brighten our days.
.... In all kinds of wonderful,
.... Magical ways.
.... Their thoughtfulness comes,
....As a gift from above.
....And we feel we're surrounded,
....By warm, caring love.
....Like upside-down rainbows,
....Their smiles bring the sun.
....And they fill ho-hum moments,
.... With laughter and fun.
....Friends are like angels,
....Without any wings.
....Blessing our lives,
....With the most precious things.
I love this, this is how I feel some days. LOL
Written about Monday 2006-04-24
Written: (6577 days ago)
Wrote a new poem about a week ago, I was in a dark place at the time. I take it hard when my friends don't talk to me. I start to think they no longer like me and then I fall into a slump of saddness filled with self hate. I blame myself for the lost of my friendships, even though half the time I did nothing wrong to cause that lose. I go around in a sort of daze, but no one even notices. I guess I have become so good at hiding my feelings from those that I love that I forget to tell them when I am feeling down. I am so use to being alone, that I find it hard to tell them how I feel. Something that I really must work hard on, remembering that I have someone that I can turn to and count on when I am down.
My house is full of sadness. I can't stop my tears from flowing, they seem to have taken a life of there own. My head feels hallow, my eyes are red and blotchy, my nose is stuffed and my heart aches. When will it all end, this sorrow that fills my soul. I am so tired.
Came on to discover that my very good and dear friend [pumpkin king] passed away on sunday January 15, 2006. Jon, his given name, was 29 years old. He had a bad heart, it finally gave out. He was a musican and a very good one. He could draw and he could write, he was gifted in many ways. He was kind and loving and was a good and true friend to me. I will never forget him for as long as I live.
Its weird to me that he is gone, cause I spoke to him last on Sunday. He told me of his new band and how he was happy to play. We kidded about it being a punk band, when he was a Rocker, but he said it was music and all music is good. I agreed with him and wished him luck. We spoke about one day him coming here and visiting.
Jon, I hope that wherever you are, you are happy and hopefully playing your music. I look forward to meeting you again in our next life.
Missing you already. With all my love, Shay