.............\
.............(0 o)
....,---ooO(_)-------,
.......|` Where the ``|
.......| fuck is my ````|
.......|damn pizza rolls|
.......'------
...........|__
............|| ||
...........ooO Ooo
lmao
Your shady hat $30
your ecko jeans $65
your g-unit shirt $43
sweatshirt 75$
your rocawear socks 21$
your nexi $100
your bling bling $250
your gucci du-rag $25
Realizing that you're white..
Priceless
lmao
--------------
~Stubborn and hard-hearted.
~Strong-willed and highly motivated.
~Sharp Thoughts.
~Easily angered.
~Attracts others and loves attention.
~Deep Feelings.
~Beautiful physically and mentally.
~Firm Standpoint.
~Needs no Motivation.
~Shy towards opposite sex.
~Easily consoled.
~Systematic (left Brain).
~Loves to dream.
~Strong clairvoyance.
~Understanding
~Sickness usually in the ear and neck.
~Good imagination.
~Good physical.
~Weak Breathing.
~Loves literature and the arts.
~Loves traveling.
~Dislike being at home.
~Restless.
~Not having many children.
~Hardworking.
~High spirited..
~If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will become close to someone you do not speak to much in the next 4 days.
[1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex on a piece of paper.
2. Which color is your favorite out of red, black, blue, green and yellow?
3. Your first initial
4. Your month of birth
5. Which color do you like most? Black or white?
6. Name of a person of the same gender as you.
7. Do you like California or Florida more?
8. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?
9. Write down a realistic wish.
ARE YOU DONE? IF SO, SCROLL DOWN..
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THE ANSWERS
1. You are completely in love with this person
2. If you choose: RED - You are alert and your life is full of love. BLACK - You are conservative and aggressive GREEN - Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back BLUE - You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the one you love YELLOW - You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down
3. If your initial is: A-K - You have a lot of love and friendship in your life L-R - You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom S-Z - You like to help others and your future love life looks very good
4. If you were born in: JAN.-MAR. - The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected APR.-JUNE - You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but with memories that will last forever JULY-SEPT. - You will have a great year and experience a major life changing experience for the good OCT.-DEC. - Your love life will not be too great, but eventually, you will find your soul mate
5. If you chose: BLACK - Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard for you at the time but it will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change. WHITE - You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend.
7. If you chose: CALIFORNIA - You like adventure FLORIDA - You are laid back
8. If you chose: LAKE - You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved. OCEAN - You are spontaneous and like to please people.
9. This wish will only come true if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN on your house within the next hour and it will come true before your next birthday!!!!!!!]
ROSES ARE DEAD
VIOLETS ARE TOO
YOU THOUGHT YOU HURT ME AND MADE ME CRY
BUT I WAS IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER GUY
YOU SIT AROUND AND TALK YOUR SHIT
SO FUCK YOU AND YOUR LIL ASS DICK
YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME BUT IT WASNT TRUE
WELL GUESS WHAT MOTHERFUCKER I PLAYED YOU TOO
hmm...
December 23rd~ January 1st = Red
January 2nd ~ January 11th = Orange
January 12th ~ January 24th = Yellow
January 25th ~ February 3rd = Pink
February 4th ~ February 8th = Blue
February 9th ~ February 18th = Green
February 19th ~ February 28th = Brown
March 1st ~ March 10th = Aqua
March 11th ~ March 20th = Lime
March 21st = Black
March 22nd ~March 31st = Purple
April 1st ~ April 10th = Navy
April 11th ~ April 20th = Silver
April 21st ~ April 30th = White
May 1st ~ May 14th = Blue
May 15th ~ May 24th = Gold
May 25th ~ June 3rd= Cream
June 4th ~ June 13th = Grey
June 14th ~ June 23rd = Maroon
June 24th = Grey
June 25th ~ July 4th = Red
July 5th ~ July 14th = Orange
July 15th ~ July 25th = Yellow
July 26th ~ August 4th = Pink
August 5th ~ August 13th = Blue
August 14th ~ August 23rd = Green
August 24th ~ September 2nd = Brown
September 3rd ~ September 12th = Aqua
September 13th ~ September 22nd = Lime
September 23rd = Olive
September 24th ~October 3rd = Purple
October 4th ~ October 13th = Navy
October 14th ~ October 23rd = Silver
October 24th ~ November 11th = White
November 12th ~ November 21st = Gold
November 22nd ~ December 1st = Cream
December 2nd ~ December 11th = Grey
December 12th ~ December 21st = Maroon
December 22nd = Teal
*RED* Cute and lovable type, You are picky but always in love...and liked to be loved. Fresh and cheerful, but can be "moody" at times. Capable with people nice, soft, and that can love you for the way you are. Likes people that are easy to talk to and can make you feel comfortable. >
*CREAM* Competitive and sportive. Don't like losing and always cheerful! You are trustworthy, and very out going. You choose love carefully, and don't fall in love easily. But once you find the right one, you don't let go for a long time.
*TEAL* You are mostly interested in your looks. And have high standards in picking love. You think and make a solution precisely, and hardly make stupid mistakes. You like to lead and it is easy for you to make new friends.You are very competitive and love to be first.
*GREY* You are attractive and active. You never hide your feelings and express everything that's inside. But can be selfish at times. You want to be noticed, and don't like to be treated unequally. You can brighten up peoples day. You know what to say at the right time and you have good sense of humor.
*GREEN* You get along well with new people. You are not really a shy person, but sometimes you can hurt people's feelings by your words... You like to be loved and noticed by your lover, but mostly you are single, waiting for the right person.
*GOLD* You know what's right and what's wrong. You are cheerful and out going. It's hard for you to find the one you want, but once you find the right person, you won't be able to fall in love again for a long time.
*PINK* You are always trying your best in everything, and like to help and care for other people. But you are not easily satisfied. You have negative thoughts, and you look for romantic love like in a fairytale.
*YELLOW* You are sweet and innocent. Trusted by many people and have a strong leadership towards relationships. You make good decision and make the right choice at the right time. And always dreaming of romantic relationship.
*MAROON* You are intelligent and know what's right. You like to make things go your way, which can sometimes cause trouble for not thinking about other people's feelings. But you're patient when it comes to love. Once you get a hold of the right person, it's hard for you to find a better love.
*ORANGE* You are responsible for your own actions, and you know how to treat people. You always have goals to reach and you really work hard to get there, you are competitive. Your friends are really important to you and you appreciate what you have, you sometimes over react that's because you are sensitive.
*PURPLE* You are mysterious, never selfish and get interested in things easily. Your day can be sad or happy depending on your mood. You are popular between friends but you can act stupid at times, and forget things easily. You go for a person that's trustworthy.
*LIME* You are calm, but easily stressed out. You get jealous easily, and complain over little things. You can't get stuck into one thing, but you have a capable personality for everyone to trust you and like you.
*SILVER* You are imaginative and fun, you love trying new things. You like to challenge yourself and you learn things easily, you're easy to talk to and you give good advice. When it comes to friendship, you find it hard to trust someone, but once you find the right friend, you trust them forever.
*BLACK* You are challenging, and have the "guts". But you don't like changes in your life. And once you make a decision, you keep it that way for a long time. Your love life is also challenging, and different.
*OLIVE* You are warm and light hearted. You seem to flow well with friends and family. You don't like violence and know what's right. You are kind and cheerful, people that are easy to talk but don't envy other people easily.
*BROWN* You are active and sportive. It's hard for other people to become close with you, but you fall in love easily. But once you find out you can't get something, you give up and let go easily as well.
*BLUE* You may have low self-esteem, and can be very picky. You are artistic and like to fall in love, but you let your love pass by, by loving with your mind, not your heart.
*NAVY* You are attractive, and love your life. You have a strong feeling towards everything. And very easily distracted. Once you get angry at someone, its hard for you to forgive them.
*WHITE* You dream and have goals in your life. You get jealous easily and you don't react to things easily. You are different and sometimes weird, but everyone loves that in you.
*AQUA* Your feelings change suddenly and easily. You are always lonely, and like traveling. You are truthful, but listen and believe other people too easily. It's hard to find love for you, and you get lost in love easily, Sometimes get hurt by love.
20 ways to keep yourself sane:
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses
on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something,
ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in"
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone
has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors".
7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the
prophecy."
8. Don't use any punctuation marks
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
11. Specify that your drive-through! order is "to go".
12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard Devon.
17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!", "I won!"
"3rd time this week!!!!!"
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "run for your lives, they're loose!!"
19. Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
20. Put this in all of your profiles
ALWAYS REMEMBER:
1. Somebody is very proud of you.
2. Somebody is thinking of you.
3. Somebody is caring about you.
4. Somebody misses you.
5. Somebody wants to talk to you.
6. Somebody wants to be with you.
7. Somebody hopes you aren't in trouble.
8. Somebody is thankful for the support you have provided.
9. Somebody wants to hold your hand.
10. Somebody hopes everything turns out all right.
11. Somebody wants you to be happy.
12. Somebody is celebrating your successes.
13. Somebody wants to give you a gift.
14. Somebody thinks that you are a gift.
15. Somebody hopes you're not too cold, or too hot
16. Somebody wants to hug you.
17. Somebody loves you.
18. Somebody admires your strength.
19. Somebody is thinking of you and smiling.
20. Somebody wants to be your shoulder to cry on.
21. Somebody wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun.
22. Somebody thinks the world of you.
23. Somebody wants to protect you.
24. Somebody would do anything for you.
25. Somebody wants to be forgiven by you.
26. Somebody is grateful for your forgiveness.
27. Somebody wants to laugh with you.
28. Somebody remembers you and wishes that you were there.
29. Somebody is praising God for you.
30. Somebody needs to know that your love for them is unconditional.
31. Somebody values your advice.
32. Somebody wants to tell you how much they care.
33. Somebody wants to share their dreams with you.
34. Somebody wants to hold you in their arms.
35. Somebody wants you to hold them in your arms.
36. Somebody treasures your spirit.
37. Somebody wishes they could stop time because of you.
38. Somebody praises God for your friendship and love.
39. Somebody can't wait to see you.
40. Somebody loves you for who you are.
41. Somebody loves the way you make them feel.
42. Somebody wants to be with you (forever and ever).
43. Somebody wants you to know they are there for you (always).
44. Somebody is glad that you're their friend.
45. Somebody wants to be your friend.
46. Somebody stayed up all night thinking about you.
47. Somebody is alive because of you.
48. Somebody is wishing that you noticed them.
49. Somebody wants to get to know you better.
50. Somebody wants to be near you.
51. Somebody misses your advice and guidance.
52. Somebody has faith in you.
53. Somebody trusts you...A lot.
54. Somebody needs your support.
55. Somebody needs you to have faith in them.
56. Somebody needs you to let them be your friend.
57.Somebody hears a song that reminds them of you.
58.Somebody will cry when they read this.
Just SOme Sex Facts:
+MEN+
1) 94% of men lie about their penis size. According to condom manufacturers, only 6% of men use extra large condoms.
2) The average man is 5 inches long when erect (no matter what you have heard ladies, that's the truth).
3) 80% of American men are circumsized. Even though Pediatrics say it is not necessary.
4) No matter what all the ads say, nothing can make your penis grow but time (most men reach the end of their growth by the early 20's)
5) There is no correlation between penis size and shoe size, hand size, or nose size.
6) Blue balls does exist! It's technically called "prostatic congestion."
7) Only 16% of men shave their privates.
+Some stuff on the ladies+
1) Only 9% of women around the globe consider themselves "attractive" (20% of British women do).
2) 43% of women use the term "natural" to describe themselves, 24% say they have "average" looks,
8% prefer the term "feminine",
7% say they are "good looking",
and 7% say they are "cute",
and finally only 2% of women say they are "sexy".
2) An estimated 85% of women wear the wrong size bra.
3) 50% of women have had breast implants.
4) 85% of women dont like performing oral sex
5) 90% of women shave their privates.
+Both+
1) Masturbation is healthy for both men and women.
2) 70% of highschoolers have had sex before they have graduated.
3) 27% loose their virginity senior prom night.
4) Only 3% wait until marriage.
5) 95% of men would have sex with a girl after 1 month of dating. Only 10% of women feel this way.
----
+5 Reasons Why Sex is Good:
1) It is a good workout. Sex burns about 150 calories every half an hour of it. It will lower your cholesterol and improve breathing circulation.
2) You won't get sick. According to research if you have sex 1-2 times a week you are less likely to get sick.
3) You'll feel happier. You will feel a greater sense of well-being. Women who have more sex were clinically proven to be less depressed than women who dont have sex.
4) Makes you look better - [ problem is, ugly people don`t get any ]. Sex releases hormones in you which make your skin and hair softer and shinier and tone your physique.
5) (The best reason) You will live longer. Studies prove that sex makes you live longer. Men who had sex 1-2 times a week had half the death rate as those who did not indulge themselves at least once a month. It also makes you look younger. If you have sex 3 times a week you may look up to 10 years younger than you really are.
Did You Know?
--------------
1) Having sex 3 times a week for 1 year adds up to running 75 miles!!!!
2) having sex increases the amount cortisol and adrenaline in your brain inturn making you smarter. so getting fucked on test day is actually a good thing!!
Statements about sex:
1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth.
2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis,ski
3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.
4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!
5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.
6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones.The
7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.
8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.
9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.
10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.
So now you know...if they ever ask you which sport is healthiest, you know which one and why!!;)
SEX IS LIKE MATH:
add a bed
subtract the clothes
divide the legs
and pray to God u don't multiply
SEX IS:
like Nokia; connecting ppl
like Nike; just do it
like Pepsi; ask 4 more
like Coca cola; enjoy
like pringles once you pop you cant stop
oo..new glasses there purple! <3!
Kissing is a habbit
Fucking is a game
guys get all the pleasure
girls get all the pain
the guy says he loves you
you believe its true
your stomache starts to swell
he says, Fuck you
1 hour of pleasure
9 months of pain
3 days in the hospital
A baby without a name
The baby is a bastard
The mother is a whore
This never would have happened
If the rubber had been worn
A man walked into a supermarket with his zipper down. A lady cashier
walked up to him and said, "Your barracks door is open."
Not a phrase that men normally use, he went on his way looking a bit
puzzled. When he was about done shopping, a man came up and said,
"Your fly is open."
He zipped up and finished his shopping.
At the checkout, he intentionally got in the line where the lady
was that told him about his "barracks door." He was planning to have a
little fun with her, so when he reached the counter he said, "When
you saw my barracks door open, did you see a Marine standing in there at
attention?"
The lady (naturally smarter than the man) thought for a moment and
said, "No, no I didn't. All I saw was a disabled veteran sitting on
a couple of old duffel bags."
There are 3 things every person should know about what a rocker wants:
1.Sex
2.Money
3.More sex and even more money XD
A husband, one bright sunny morning, turns to his lovely wife, "Wife, we're going fishing this weekend, you, me and the dog."
The wife grimaces, "But I don't like fishing!"
"Look! We're going fishing and that's final."
"Do I have to go fishing with you... I really don't want to go!"
"Right I'll give you three choices... 1 You come fishing with me and the dog... 2 You give me a BLOW JOB.... 3 or you take it up the ass!"
The wife grimaces again, "But I don't want to do any of those things!"
"Wife I've given you three options.. You'll HAVE to do one of them! I'm going to the garage to sort out my fishing tackle, when I come back I expect you to have made up your mind!"
The wife sits and thinks about it.
Twenty minutes later her husband comes back, "Well! What have you decided? FISHING with me and the dog, BLOW JOB, or ass?"
The wife complains some more and finally makes up her mind, "O.K. I'll give you a blow job!"
"Great!" He says and drops his pants. The wife is on her knees doing the business. Suddenly she stops, looks up at her Husband, "Oh! It tastes absolutely disgusting... It tastes all shitty!"
"Yes!" says her husband "The dog didn't want to go fishing either."
absolutelly disgusting!!
KIAWANI ((KEY-UGH-WUAN-E))
my roleplay name..kingdom harts role play!!!! go its freakin coowell!
"That's Fucked up"
Guy"Can we have sex right now?"
Girl: "Can we do what?"
Guy: "You know, can I be your first, finally?"
Girl: "Um.....no."
Guy: "Why?"
Girl: "Because, 1. you have a girlfriend, who happens to be my friend......."
Guy: "So, if you don't tell, I won' tell."
Girl: "Besides that, I'm waiting for someone special. Someone that I want to be with for the rest of my life to be my first."
Guy: "I'm not special to you?"
Girl: "You're my friend. That's all."
Guy: looks forward and keeps driving.
5 minutes pass.......
Guy: starts to run his hand up the girl's thigh.
Girl: moves his hand, "Don't touch me?"
Guy: tries to kiss her.
Girl: screams, "Would you stop."
Guy: continues trying.
Girl: moves to the back seat
Guy: parks on an abandoned street and gets in the backseat with the girl. Starts to kiss her.
Girl: pushes him off and scoots over, "Please, don't do this."
Guy: "Don't do what, I know you want it, I can see it in your eyes." Moves over to her and starts to unbutton her pants.
Girl: pushes him harder and says, "No, don't."
Guy: getting aggravated, punches her and tells her to stop "playing hard to get".
Girl: crying, continues to fight.
Guy: punches her harder, pulls her pants off, and holds her down.
Girl: screams as he penetrates her, "NO, please don't do this to me!"
Guy: puts his hand over her mouth.
An hour passes........
Guy: pulls back and wipes himself off.
Girl: sits on the corner of the seat, sobbing.
Guy: looks at her and says, "You better not tell anybody about this. If you're really my friend, you won't tell anybody about this. You know I love you." He reaches out his hand to touch her cheek.
Girl: pulls back, "Just take me home, now."
Guy: says, "Alright." Gets in the front seat and drives her home.
2 months later.........
Girl: "Doctor, what's wrong with me. I haven't had my time of the month in 2 months."
Doctor: looks at her, "You haven't been having your "time" for a reason."
Girl: looks at him and says, "Why?" dreading the answer that she was sure to receive.
Doctor: "You are pregnant."
Girl: faints.
The story gets out that she is pregnant, and people start looking to the Guy. He claims that it isn't his because she was sleeping with every guy in the school(which was a lie). He goes to her and tells her, "I'm telling you, if you lie to people and say that I raped you, I'll kill you."
The Girl is completely devastated. First, he took her virginity and got her pregnant....th
Girls, if this story touched you, repost it as "That's Fucked up"
Guys, if this story touched you, repost it as "I'll kill any fucker who does this to my girl or any girl:
(Between insecurity and insanity...)
Did u know? B4 u go to sleep at night there is 1 person of the opposite sex thinking of u. They want you they want to kiss u, They want to be with u they are always thinking about u b4 they go to sleep at night they are longing to be with u. This is all true not a fake if u repost this to in 5 mins the person that is longing to be with you will approach you in a month and ask u out or grab u and snog the face off u. But if you break thischain no1 will like u or ask u again for 5 years!!!
so true
[×´`•¸.•ºA good friendº•.¸•´`×
º•.¸•´`×Will pick you ×´`•¸.•º
×´`•¸.•ºBack up whenº•.¸•´`×
×´`•¸.•ºYou fall but yourº•.¸•´`×
º•.¸•´`×Best friend will laugh×´`•¸.•º
×´`•¸.•ºAnd push you right º•.¸•´`×
º•.¸•´`× *Back down* ×´`•¸.]
i dont understand!!!
Guy Facts:
When a guy calls u
he wants to be with you
When a guy is quiet,
He's listening to you...
When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he's wrong
When a guy says, "I'm fine," after a few minutes,
he means it
When a guy stares at you,
he thinks you're the most beautiful thing in the world
When you're laying your head on a guy's chest
he has the world
When a guy calls you everyday
he is in love
When a (good) guy say he loves you
he means it
When a guy says he can't live without you
he's with you till your done
When a guy says, "I miss you,"
he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else
Girl facts:
When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her mind.
When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.
When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions,
she is wondering how long you will be around.
When a girl answers, "I'm fine," after a few seconds,
she is not at all fine.
When a girl stares at you,
she is wondering why you are so wonderful.
When a girl lays on your chest,
she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
When a girl calls you everyday,
she is seeking for your attention.
When a girl wants to see you everyday,
she wants to be pampered.
When an honest girl says, "Ill love you forever,"
she means it.
When a girl says that she can't live without you,
she has made up her mind that you are her future.
When a girl says, "I miss you,"
no one in this world can miss you more than that
post this as "WHEN A GUYS SAYS HE MISSES YOU !!"
I want to be someones last
call of the night, and their
first thought in the morning.
I want those 5 hour conversations
That end up in "No you hang up first"'