well, i have no clue what to put in here anymore, guess life throws curve balls once in a while, and i just got nailed and swung to soon, so strike one against me, .....all i can say is that i love mandi to death, and nothing will ever change that,

you think you have friends, friends are just a lie, they arent real, my dad tells me to choose my friends better, my mom says "that just goes to show who real friends are, real friends just want you to be happy, not try to destroy your life", from now on, im being more cautious to who i talk to,

What can i say, ...im in love with the woman i am gonna spend the rest of my life with, i wish i could give her the world, she knows i would do anything for her, she knows she is all i ever think about, shes the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, she makes me soo happy no matter what, her smile makes me feel like i can fly, her eyes are beautiful, her personality is outa this world, her laugh makes my heart melt, the way she touches my makes me fall deeper and deeper in love with her, the way she holds me says that she will never leave me, the way she kisses me shows the passion in our love for eachother, mandi, i know you are gonna read this, and i want you to know that i appreaciate you so much, i could never ask for a girl that is as perfect as you and i could never dream of anyone more perfect than you are, because your everything to me, your the most beautiful girl in the world to me, and having the chance to be in love with you is the greatest chance i have ever been given, and i promise you that i will do everything in my power to make your life the greatest i can and give you everything you need, and anything you want, .....im yours for life hun,

lmfao HAHAHA this is mandi here i goted matty's password but dont worrie it's been him on all these times and besides he like just lefted and i just wanted to say .. i love you matty lmao and haha i wont mess up anything in r profile i promise or talk to anyone or stuff like that lmao... but yeah it's been like iono ... 10 min's since he left fer home and tonight was our one month anaversery lmao... we've been together for a whole month aint that exciting.. well i think so lmao.. yeah and so i just wanted t say nght and i love you matty oh and he wont have internet back fer a while it goted shuted offed lmao... b/c his dad was being BALD...lmao

well, im really sad right now, i miss mandi soo bad, when i was on the phone with her she was in kentucky and i tried not to cry, i love her more than i could ever put into words, a week without her will be harder to go through than chemo therapy for a lifetime, i miss her sooo soo much, and i love her too death, i just hope and pray that shes safe and ok, i wish i could be with her and hold her in my arms, cause thats where she belongs,

ok, im ballin my eyes out, i KNOW i have found the girl i want to spend the rest of my life with, mandi, i love you forever, and we will never part, i shall always be with you

From here to eternity

i have been singing Your love amazes me by John Berry all day long to myself thinking about mandi, she knows how much i love her, i love you mandi, with every breath that i take, with every thought i will ever have, i will always love you, im always yours, i love you soo soo soo much,

ok, i had another dream lastnight, yet again i was superman, this time it was a difficult one,

ok, it started out with me walking down the path by the river downtown, and it was summer, and there was a clear forecast for the day, and i realized i was wearing glasses, and i was in a business suit, and the weather was about 80 degrees out, and i wasnt hot at all, and within a couple seconds clouds rolled in and lightning struck a buildinng downtown. i looked around and see everyone running in every which way to find shelter, just as that happened a strong gust of wind came blowing through the city and was knocking tree limbs down everywhere, powerlines were being broked from fallen limbs, and i knew this was getting serious, i looked around me to make sure there was no one watching me, they were too busy worried about finding shelter, so i ran down the path under a small overpass of a bridge down by cereal city, went i went in one side of it i was dressed in the business suit, when i came out the other side, i was dressed as superman, i turned around as fast as i could to get a glimps of a tornado forming, and at the same time there were people gettin hurt around the city from fallen debris, at that point i had to make a tough choice, it was the tornado, or the people, and i made the choice to get rid of the tornado, ....i flew up into the sky, i took in the biggest breath i could, when i made it into the coulds it started hailing baseball sized hail, i took in even more air, then i concentrated it on the storm and with every ounce of energy i had i blew it and it took a few seconds for it to effect it, the tornado started to go flat, and it was pulled apart by the force of my breath, and the storm started to dissapate, and i quit exhailing and started to breathe again. then i woke up

the thought of her runs through my mind constantly, i close my eyes and shes in my arms and im the happiest guy on this planet, i love you soo much mandi

ok, time to write here again, I LOVE YOU MANDI, just had to put that in there,

ok, i had another strange dream that strung out from the previous one, ....it picks up where i stand up and wipe the dirt off my cape and suit, then i see the army guys from the base being deployed out to pennfield and try to stop the 300ft guy, and i see aircrafts taking off in the distance from Air National Guard base, and more jets coming from all directions, they were trying to help and i jumped back into the air and bolted upwards into the sky, and I drew my body back and with all my force and power, I took off in mid air as fast as i could and it caused a massive sonic boom from where i took off, and in a matter of 2 seconds i bolted back to pennfield and struck the guy with everything i had and picked him up into the air using all my might, and this mirror looking object coming flying out of the sky and i heard "This is the phantom zone, my son, it is used to imprison the most vicious criminals ever to pleague the universe, use it wisely my son." and i threw him into the mirror and it closed up and he was trapped, and it flew back into space. then i woke up


pretty strange i will say,

i hung out with mandi for a few mins tonight, it was fun, i love being around her, shes perfect in my eyes, and when i hugged her before i left, i didnt want to really let go, but i did, i wish i could have her in my arms forever, thats how much i love her, I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH MANDI

ok, i had another strange superman dream lastnight,

ok heres how it was, i was walking outside of one of the buildings here in downtown battle creek, and i was talking to some people and we were getting ready to go and eat at a place across the street from there, and out in the distance i can hear people yelling and screaming for help, i had no clue why tho, i asked the two people that were with me if they heard it too, then they looked at me like i was crazy, then i realized what was going on, then i told them to go to the restaurant and wait for me because i forgot to put more money in the coin box for parking the car (as a cover up), and i jogged down the sidewalk looking around and i turned down a small alley between these two buildings, and i pulled open my shirt and there it was, and at that point i knew what i had to do, i started rising off the ground as i was taking the rest of my clothes off and i dropped my glasses on the ground too, and there i was suspended in air in a full superman costume, and i listened closly for another scream to figure out where it was coming from, and i bolted into the air and stopped for a second and i could see where it was coming from, so i flew as fast as i could out to pennfield, and there was this gigantic guy smashing things, this guy must have been about 300 ft tall and he was picking up houses and throwing them like baseballs, .....i flew within a couple feet of him and told him to stop, and he swung his hand at me and it missed me, and i figured so he wants to play hard ball, so i drew my fist back and threw a hard punch at him and it knocked him back a little bit, then he caught me off guard and punched me while i was flying and it sent be across the city out into fort custer making a gigantic crater where i crashed, and then i got up and wiped my cape and suit off, and then i woke up

I love this girl, and i cant quit thinking about her, shes always on my mind, i love her sooo much,

IN LOVE WITH MANDI!!

well, i guess this is the time that i pour my heart out on here, .....well first thing, ....there is a girl that i like,......well im in love with her, but she only knows that i like her, .....i dont want her to be all freaked out and stuff, ......i love talking to her all the time, ........i wish i could explain whats all running through my head right now, .....but i cant, its way way too incomprehensable

The only thing that stays the same, is everything changes

Life is soo unexpected and uncertain, you can be here on minute and gone the next, nobody knows exactly when there time has come, ...one day you will feel strong and invincible, the next, you can feel beaten, broken and near death, this is life tho, we all have good days and we all have bad days, some of us have been cursed with illnesses that are completely devistating, and leave us asking why, while the ones who deserve it live a full life with no troubles at all, it is the innocent that suffer for years, months, and sometimes a few days and then their life is over, its sad to see these things happen to young children, ones with disabilities, ones with incurable illnesses, ones who dont even have a fighting chance to survive another day, ....in general, life isnt all that great anymore, i mean no matter what there is always some sort of illness wheather it be leathal or non-leathal that will always nail you no matter what, why does life involve living in constant pain, in constant agony? why cant there be just one time, one time to be free of pain, free of stress, free of aching and free of being sick? .....i guess thats a question that will never get answered, but to be pondered for all of eternity

well, i have lymph node after lymph node swelling up one right after the other, ...which isnt good, ....i know its more serious than what everyone else thinks, and i know that it will ultimatly claim my life, ....not sure when, but it will happen eventually, ...... why me?

Restless Heart - Bluest eyes in Texas

That lonesome texas sun was setting slow
And in the rear view mirror, I watched it go
I can still see wind in her golden hair
I close my eyes for a moment, and I'm still there

The bluest eyes in texas
Are haunting me tonight
Like the stars fill the midnight sky
Her memory fills my mind
Where did I go wrong? did I wait to long?
Or can I make things right?
The bluest eyes in texas
Are haunting me tonight

Another town, another hotel room
Another dream that ended way too soon
Left me lonely, prayin' for the dawn
Searching for the strength to carry on

The bluest eyes in texas
Are haunting me tonight
Like the stars fill the midnight sky
Her memory fills my mind
Where did I go wrong? did I wait to long?
Or can I make things right?
The bluest eyes in texas
Are haunting me tonight

For every heart you break, you pay a price
But I can't forget the tears in her blue eyes

The bluest eyes in texas
Are haunting me tonight
Like the stars fill the midnight sky
Her memory fills my mind
Where did I go wrong? did I wait to long?
Or can I make things right?
The bluest eyes in texas
Are haunting me tonight