Money never makes you happy and the more I spend the more hollow I get.
I want to be happy and hold my baby once more but all the money in the world
can't bring back my baby girl.
So I sit here missing and wondering how she is. I want to hold her and hear her cries
to feel her soft skin and cradled in my arms
but it's never going to happen...
I miss my baby so much
I miss you, and everything we've been through.
I miss your smile, your laugh, and your cries.
I miss holding you in my arms, feeling your heart beat with mine
Seeing you sleep so peacefully and knowing you are mine.
But now you're gone, and belong to someone else
The pain I have without you is unbearable and sometimes I don't want to carry on,
but I know that you'll be happy and are given what you deserve
I though it hurts, I want you know I still love you more than anything in this world.
here i am, only a week left before the big day. worse part is i'm stuck wide awake thinking about the events to come. its not thatt i'm scared or i regret what i've done, i just wish things could have gone differently and that this could have all worked out but sometimes things happen for the best... no matter how you wish they could be different.
i need a nap -.-
I spent my entire day cooking, cleaning, and packing up shit. I just gonna check my emails and stuff, watch a movie perhaps then pass out till six. Good plan to me :D
Hey so I wont be back on for awhile due to the fact its THANKSGIVING!!
Ugh i wanna write again but i have no f*ing idea what to write!
I wanna be a terrific writer and have millions of people reading my books like harry potter, twilight (even if it sucks), or house of night :/ lord help me
College is not only meant for higher education, but for also certain experiences...
Here is all the stuff I have done in my first week of college!
1. Went to my first college party
2. Got drunk off of beer for the first time
3. Had sex with a girl
4. Had sex with a guy in a college dorm room
5. Got drunk off of two Margaritas, and a strong strawberry daiquiri
6. Smoked cigarettes for the first time in 8 years
7. Had sex with my child hood friend (who was also married)
8. Went to a mardi gras masquerade thing and partied like hell
9. Went to a college pool party and made it through 9 jello shots
10. Got a belly piercing and a tattoo all in one day and didn't even cry, scream, or squirmed!!!
Did all of that in the past week and a half! I look at these and think i should feel like a slut on these but i don't regret my decisions and i would do every last one of them over again! XD
I'm sorry if I don't talk to you for sometimes. I'm battling out family issues and it's probably going to be awhile till I can talk to you again. I'll probably get on every now and then but I'll be back on in January for good!
The song of my day!!!!
Kerosene By: Miranda Lambert
I'm waitin' on the sun to set cause yesterday aint over yet
I started smoking cigarettes there's nothing else to do I guess
Dusty roads aint made for walking, spinning tires aint made for stoppin'
I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
I gave it everything I had and everything I got was bad
Life aint hard but it's too long to live it like some country song
Trade the truth in for a lie, cheating really aint a crime
I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
Forget your high society, I'm soakin' it in Kerosene
Light 'em up and watch them burn, teach them what they need to learn HA!
Dirty hands aint made for shakin', aint a rule that aint worth breakin'
Well I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
Now I don't hate the one who left
You can't hate someone who's dead
He's out there holding on to someone, I'm holding up my smoking gun
I'll find somewhere to lay my blame the day she changes her last name
Well I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
Well I'm giving up on love HEY love's given up on me
I'm pissed at one of my ex's and now I'm after him for revenge!
Never Have I been so insulted by men!!!
One of my ex's is flirting w/ my younger sister! And she's 14!!!
What the hell not only that we were once good friends but now he wont talk to me and now is lying to me and is talking about fucking my sister! GR!!!!
If any one has some tips to get back at him please let me know cuz I want his ass to want me back and at the same time I want him to wish he had never been born!!!
I want to fight but I can't
Stress that should be bad isn't
and the stress that isn't there I still have a head ache over.
Life sux even before you read this. lol
A Answer for another diary enterie.
Walk Away
By: Kelly Clarkson
You've got your mother and your brother
Every other undercover
Tellin' you what to say (say)
You think I'm stupid
But the truth is
That it's cupid, baby
Lovin' you has made me this way
So before you point your finger
Get your hands off of my trigger
Oh yeah
You need to know this situation's getting old
And now the more you talk
The less I can say, oh
I'm looking for attention
Not another question
Should you stay or should you go?
Well, if you don't have the answer
Why are you still standin' here?
Hey, hey, hey, hey
Just walk away
Just walk away
Just walk away
I waited here for you
Like a kid waiting after school
So tell me how come you never showed (showed)?
I gave you everything
And never asked for anything
And look at me
I'm all alone (alone)
So, before you start defendin'
Baby, stop all your pretendin'
I know you know I know
So what's the point in being slow
Let's get the show on the road today
Hey
I'm looking for attention
Not another question
Should you stay or should you go?
Well, if you don't have the answer
Why are you still standin' here?
Hey, hey, hey, hey
Just walk away
Just walk away
Just walk away
I wanna love
I want a fire
To feel the burn
My desires
I wanna man by my side
Not a boy who runs and hides
Are you gonna fight for me?
Die for me?
Live and breathe for me?
Do you care for me?
'Cause if you don't then just leave
I'm looking for attention
Not another question
Should you stay or should you go?
Well, if you don't have the answer
Why are you still standin' here?
Hey, hey, hey, hey
Just walk away
If you don't have the answer
Walk away
Just walk (walk) away
(Just walk away)
Then just leave
Yeah yeah
Walk away
Walk away
Walk away
Next Song of the Day
Tik Tok
By Ke$Ha
Wake up in the mornin feelin like P diddy
Got my glasses i'm out the door
gonna hit this city
Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of jack
Cause when I leave for the night, I ain't comin back
I'm talking - pedicures on our toes, toes
Trying on all our clothes, clothes
Boys blowing up our phones, phones
Drop-talking, playing our favorite cds
going to all the parties
Tryin to get a little bit tipsy
Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, imma fight
Till we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop, no
Woah-oh oh oh
Woah-oh oh oh (x2)
Ain't got a care in the world, but got plenty of beer
Ain't got no money in ma pocket, but I'm already here
And now the dudes are linin up cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger
I'm talking about - everybody getting crunk, crunk
Boys trying to touch my junk, junk
Gonna smack him if their getting too drunk, drunk
Now, now - we goin till they kick us out, out
but the police shut us down, down
police shut us down,
police shut us -down
Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, imma fight
Till we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop, no
Woah-oh oh oh
Woah-oh oh oh (x2)
you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up
You got me now
You got that sound
Yea, you got me
you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up
Put your hands up
Put your hands up
Now, the party don't start til I walk in...
Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, imma fight
Till we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop, no
Woah-oh oh oh
Woah-oh oh oh (x2)
I am annoyed beyond anything!
Nobody is here and I can't spell worth crap!!!
And my head hurts now. GRR!
Only 1 more day till my graduation!!!! I'm excited!!!!
Hurry up already!
Next Song of the Day
Gives You Hell
By: All-American Rejects
I wake up every evening
With a big smile on my face
And it never feels out of place
And you're still probably working
At a 9-to-5 pace
I wonder how bad that tastes
When you see my face
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
Now where's your picket fence, love?
And where's that shiny car?
It didn't ever get you far
You've never seemed so tense, love
I've never seen you fall so hard
Do you know where you are?
And truth be told, I miss you
And truth be told, I'm lying
When you see my face
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
If you find a man
That's worth a damn
And treats you well
Then he's a fool
You're just as well
Hope it gives you hell
I hope it gives you hell
Tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself
"Where did I go wrong?"
But the list goes on and on
But truth be told, I miss you
And truth be told, I'm lying
When you see my face
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
When you find a man
That's worth a damn
And treats you well
Then he's a fool
You're just as well
Hope it gives you hell
Now you'll never see
What you've done to me
You can take back your memories
They're no good to me
And here's all your lies
You can look me in the eyes
With the sad, sad look
That you wear so well
When you see my face
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
When you find a man
That's worth a damn
And treats you well
Then he's a fool
You're just as well
Hope it gives you hell
When you see my face
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
(Hope it gives you hell)
When you walk my way
Hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
(Hope it gives you hell)
When you hear this song
And you sing along
But you never tell
(You never tell)
Then you're a fool
I'm just as well
Hope it gives you hell
(Hope it gives you hell)
When you hear this song
I hope that it will give you hell
(Hope it gives you hell)
You can sing along
I hope that it puts you through hell
My Song for the Day
Send "Love Drunk" Ringtone to your Cell
By: Boys Likes Girls
Top down in the summer sun
The day we met was like a hit and run
And I still taste it on my tongue
The sky was burning up like fireworks
You made me want you oh so bad it hurts
But girl, in case you haven't heard
I used to be love drunk
But now I'm hungover
Love is forever
Forever is over
We used to kiss all night
Now it's just a barfight
So dont call me crazy
Say hello then goodbye
There's just one thing
That would make me say
I used to be love drunk
But now I'm hungover
Love is forever
But now it's over
Hot sweat and blurry eyes
We're spinning on a roller coaster ride
With the world stuck in black and white
You drove me crazy every time we touched
Now im so broken that I can't get up
Oh girl, you make me such a rush
I used to be love drunk
But now I'm hungover
Love is forever
Forever is over
We used to kiss all night
Now it's just a barfight
So dont call me crazy
Say hello then goodbye
There's just one thing
That would make me say
I used to be love drunk
But now I'm hungover
Love is forever
But now it's over
All the time I wasted on you
All the bullshit you put me through
I'm checking into rehab
Cause everything that we had
Didn't mean a thing to you
I used to be love drunk
But now I'm hungover
Love is forever
But now i'm sober
I used to be love drunk
But now I'm hungover
Love is forever
Forever is over
We used to kiss all night
Now it's just a barfight
So dont call me crazy
Say hello then goodbye
There's just one thing
That would make me say
I used to be love drunk
But now I'm hungover
Love is forever
But now it's over
Now it's over
Still taste it on my tongue
Now it's over
Though I hate how I live, I love who I am. So it sucks either way!
Though I hate my world, I love who I am. So it sucks either way!