[♫The Awesomeless!♫]'s diary

136459  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2015-05-14
Written: (1556 days ago)

Writing clears the head,
It relieves the stress,
When you write you can be,
whoever you please.

Was she MAD or was everyone else?
Why does the blankness come back,
wont it ever stay away or is it forever,
back and forth in and out.

Never feeling safe and sound,
never feeling clear,
never knowing whats going on,
Never seeing clear.

One day I hope it will fade at least,
so smiles joy and laughter return,
One day I hope it will GO AWAY,
so my brain doesn't feel so weary.

For now I shall write,
Try to beat it the only way I know,
try to return to me
and who I want to be.

136056  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2014-01-30
Written: (2025 days ago)

I understand, I do... doesn't mean it hurts any less.

124970  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2009-08-25
Written: (3643 days ago)
Next in thread: 126776

Me and my best friend...
wow...

I don't think that I have much of one anymore!
Well I do but it's not like the whole girly thing.
Don't get me wrong I can tell Adam anything but
we dont go randomly try on dresses at Debs or
we dont do those girly things those very few things
I used to enjoy as a girl...

123446  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2009-06-29
Written: (3701 days ago)

Da-Na is a skunk bag!

123135  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2009-06-15
Written: (3715 days ago)

For the next week Im alone! Sucks but whatever...

123007  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2009-06-09
Written: (3721 days ago)
Next in thread: 123018

I have a set future!

There is no doubt anymore!

There is no more fear!

This is how it will end!

122596  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-05-21
Written: (3739 days ago)

Sitting...
thinking...
Bored...
I am really bored...

120386  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2009-01-13
Written: (3868 days ago)

Fact:I'm the jealous type!
Fact:I'm self concious!

120237  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2009-01-05
Written: (3876 days ago)

FACT:I'm the happiest girl in the world

115973  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2008-06-21
Written: (4074 days ago)

I only wish to be happy
could it be that
I cant let my self be happy
because im scared that once
I get happy something
will happen and i wont be happy
ANY more... :

113087  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2008-03-30
Written: (4157 days ago)

Bored
Been here Since 4:45
gots a full tank of gas
just waiting to get home
Missing my own couch
wanting my Pajamas

103176  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2007-07-31
Written: (4400 days ago)

Not the Place To Be


A home is a place
with comfort
kindness and love


you couldnt
Get that here
not even with a shove


in this place you get
kicked pushed and
thrown around


you wanna cry
but instead you
scream real loud


you scream
you wanna
get
out


this isnt a place
you wannabe
NO DOUBT!!!


By Sissy
101337  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-06-23
Written: (4438 days ago)

Im a Complete Mess..

Dont Look at me!!!

97909  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2007-04-08
Written: (4514 days ago)

Just a little cut
and I will be just fine
Just a little cut
and it will clear my mind

Just a little cut
and my worries fade away
Just a little cut
and I'll make it through the day.

Just a tiny little cut
the pain will all subside
The smallest little cut
Pain and life coenside.

got it from [weallgloforever]

97896  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-04-07
Written: (4515 days ago)

Every girl dreams that one day she will find a guy that does these things for her. even the smallest action can have the BIGGEST impact in someones life.

• give her one of your t-shirts to sleep in.
• leave her cute text notes.
• kiss her in front of your friends.
• tell her she looks beautiful.
• look into her eyes when you talk to her.
• let her mess with your hair.
• touch her hair.
• just walk around with her.
• FORGIVE her for her MISTAKES.
• look at her like she's the only girl you see.
• tickle her even when she says stop.
• hold her hand when you're around your friends.
• let her fall asleep in your arms.
• get her mad, then kiss her.
• stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything
• tease her and let her tease you back.
• stay up all night with her when she's sick.
• watch her favorite movie with her.
• kiss her forehead.
• give her the world.
• let her wear your clothes.
• when she's sad, hang out with her.
• let her know she's important.
• when you fall in love with her, tell her.
• and when you tell her, love her like you've never loved someone before

97319  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2007-03-26
Written: (4526 days ago)

the guy i was CRAZY about... is moving away. i thought i was gonna get to hang out w/ him first. but then he got a g/f that hates me. she freaks if im even around him. so theres no chance in that. then the guy i was head over heels for i left cuz i was b-n a retard and i thought i liked this other guy but he turnd out 2 b an ass that just wanted sum ass. i think im still with him. but i havnt talked 2 him for almost a week now. then my x is practically stalkin me and all my friends. i love him but i never got to see him.

my mom doesnt see what her "boyfriend" is doin. he keeps goin back and fourth between her and his ex. i told her the next time she took him back i wasnt coming home. this moring i woke up and he was here in her bed. so im not talking to her. i cant believe she did that.

my brother wont stop freaking out on me. he saw me walking to my friends house and got really pissed at me. i cant stand it when he's mad at me. it makes me feel like a faluire. he told me not to walk the streets cuz he doesnt want me getting "hurt" and he wont let me talk to alot of the guyz that i do. its bullshit. but i kno he loves me. hes in denial that his babysister is growing up.

i cant take all the responsiblity i have to take on. i have to keep the house together. i gotta take care of my mom and brother and i feel like im the only adult type person in this house. its like ill never be able to be a kid. im spending all my time working. i dont have any friend time.

97150  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-03-24
Written: (4529 days ago)
Next in thread: 97174

I cant believe he's really moving!!!
I love him to extremes he may never kno.
I really hope i get to talk to him still after he's gone.
he's really been the only guy there for me no matter what.
in a weird way i actually am glad things turned out the way they did but it all still sucks.
my stupidity got ahold of me and i dumped him.
i guess he's back with jessie though.....

i might as well move on.. he has
i think.
I'll still miss him and love him no matter what.





and i highly doubt any1 will guess who im talking about unless i actually talk to u on a reagualr basis and even then it will b hard.


yet another worthless thought from sissy♥
PEACE.

96016  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2007-03-06
Written: (4547 days ago)

not even a home.

this house.
this home.
this crib.
this place.
its not a place,
i like 2 face.
yet i come here,
day after day.
oh what id do,
to get away.
this shelter.
this habitat.
the place i layed.
the place i sat.
the tourture.
the pain.
the agany.
the thoughts
just a wild diease,
that i have caught.



just a poem i wrote about this houshold that id rather not b in!
94887  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2007-02-16
Written: (4565 days ago)
Next in thread: 94889, 94910

-------------------Girls-----------------------
--------------are like apples----------------
---------on trees. The best ones-----------
--------are at the top of the tree.----------
------The boys dont want to reach--------
----for the good ones because they-------
--are afraid of falling and getting hurt.----
-Instead, they just get the rotten apples--
---from the ground that aren't as good, --
-but easy. So the apples at the top think-
-something is wrong with them, when in--
----reality, they're amazing. They just----
-----have to wait for the right boy to------
-------come along, the one who's---------
-------------brave enough to---------------
------------------climb all-------------------
------------------ the way-------------------
------------------to the top------------------
-----------------of the tree.-----------------

Im The Apple At the Very Tip Top of the tree R u brave enough?

94249  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-02-10
Written: (4571 days ago)

Im Sorry!!

I'm sorry
if my boobs aren't big enough to "satisfy" your needs.

I'm sorry
if I'm not skinny enough for you to see my ribs.

I'm sorry
if I'm not tan enough for you

I'm sorry
if I'm not a playboy model so I can't act like a porn star for you.

I'm sorry
If i don't have a dream body that turns you on.

I'm sorry
if im not tall enough.

I'm sorry
If I can't look "hott" every minute

I'm sorry
if my hair is not long enough.

But most of all...

I'm sorry that most guys can't accept a girl for who they really are.

92473  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2007-01-14
Written: (4598 days ago)

roses are red
viloets are bule
u make me cry inside
when i look at u
u know my i luv u
u know my plea
and just for a second i thought u luved me
i wished and i prayed
for the day u would come around
but im still waitin
here on the ground
4 u to say u luv me
and to say u that want me
but just for a second
i thought u luved me

this was written by Brandi!
but i like it!

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