[Kourtney Kamikaze]'s diary

113900  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2008-04-21
Written: (5819 days ago)

My Lucy in the Sky Experience
1. Shooting stars everywhere.
2. Jake looking like he was seperated from the rest of the world.
3. Faces in the fire.
4. Dalton fake-shitting his pants by the fire.
5. Tylers sonic-boom jump trying to break a tree. (suprisingly didn't scare me)
6. The best four hours of the most amazing feeling ever.
7. Tornadoes in the beam of a flashlight with smoke.
8. People hiding behind the trees, but not doing any harm. They were just there.
9. Imaginary nets between me and Jake while he was gathering firewood.
10. Watching the day get more beautiful as the sun rose.
11. Trying to remember the hectic day before, but kept getting distracted by everything going on.
12. Whole trees swaying for no reason.
13. Raining glitter.
14. A whole different dimension.
15. Rainbows in the tent.
16. Taste of the strip came back and made me sick.
17. Puking wasn't like the worst feeling ever.
18. Hearing Pink Floyd in my head.
19. Firetruck sirens getting really close, us scrambling to put out the fire. (luckily they didn't actually come to roberto's)
20. Seeing shadows on the trees.
21. Getting really loud, and not realizing it.
22. Hardly talking that whole night, because I was just too amazed.
23. Everything being animated.
24. The streetlight making everything look like an old war movie.
25. Zoning out to the sound of the fire popping.
26. Feeling and seeing the world move.
27. Best sex ever. =]
28. Realizing about a month later, that there was no streetlight, I hallucinated that entirely.

Goddamn, that was amazing. Definetly an experience.

78887  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

Heartbroken
Another try at love broken down so fast,
It's just like everything else thats happened in the past.
I thought I need to find something in you,
But it didn't take me long and then I knew.
You weren't looking for the same thing I was looking for,
Even in the end I ended up broken on the floor.
Everyone says it's not that bad,
They don't even know how incredibly sad,
I can become when love is absent in my life,
Trying to hide from that rendering bloody knife.

78886  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

There's a thin line between love and hate my dear...
Loving you, Loving me.
Breaking down for all to see.
Hating you, Hating me.
Finally breathing, for this world is free.
Can't explain it. Can't deny.
Why my life is full of heartbreaking good-byes.
I need your love, I need you here.
Come closer and I'll keep you forever dear.
Someone's waiting, Someone's in love,
Just give me that final shove,
Into your heart, I'll give you my hand.
We'll make each others life completely grand.

78885  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

Divine
I need to look you in the eye and tell you everything I feel.
Oh the secrets I would reveal.
And how I love your eyes,
That are tired, I'm sure, of all the endured cries.
And once your within my arms, yoo'll forget all the damage that once was caused,
In this moment you shall even pause,
Pondering if this moment is even true,
And I'll confirm your worst fears, and let you know that I want to be with you.

78884  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

A Night of Ecstasy
Your skin touches mine,
Sending a shiver down my spine.
You caress my body with your fingertips,
As I kiss your lustrous lips.
We push our hips closer together.
This is a night we'll always remember.
Every part of your body chiseled into my mind.
Showing me a part of you I could never find.

78883  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

Untitled
This time is your last,
I'll take this fucking gun and blast,
The heart right out of your chest,
I thought, for me, you were the best.
Now I know I was wrong.
I seem to have waited way too fucking long.
Too long to notice the lies.
Every minute some more of me dies.
It's all your fault,
I should've kept my heart in that cold damp vault.
Never allowed to love,
To play an old game of push and shove.

78882  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

Untitled
I don't need your lies,
Your beautifully decieving eyes,
They penetrate my skin,
Surely to God this isn't the end.
I let everything go to waste,
Now I'm sitting here in all this haste
Rotting in your memory,
Only to become your enemy.
Love is hates only disguis.
And once you're lost in your own demise,
Hatred will bring you back,
Showing you the world and all it may lack.

78881  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

Thoughts
This one thought has been running through my head,
The thought that for months I knew I would dread.
I dry my eyes and pull myself up for the very first time.
I haven't sopken since you walked away, I've written my feelings down in a rhyme.
I dreamed of all the good times coming back again,
I broke my promise, I said I'd never let you win.
And you know I'd rather see you happy with someone else, than miserable with me,
This thought laughs at me as I break down to my knees.
The tears come pouring for the very latest time,
I look deep inside my soul and see that loving you was a crime.

78880  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

It's the Day for Me
This day it brings out everything that's gone wrong,
Everything that should've found a place to belong.
This is for all the fools who never found where they should really be.
Make your way through all the blood and debris,
Find my voice and find my words ringing through the air,
Kill all that don't represent this sin, to you I dare.
Think of your leader and smile when you are fulfilling this deed,
Make all those others feel their fate to bleed.
When all the people who are left after this gut-wrenching battle,
All will hush the deafening sound of all their prattle.
And worship the ground of your leader in the end,
For once you will have found a good and true friend.

78879  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

Not So Beautiful Breakdown
Another infatuation lost in all my demise,
Losing faith in your clever disguise.
I fear another breakdown,
Looking for a full bottle to help my sorrows drown.
I don't understand, I don't quite get it this time,
My heart and my feelings both at their prime.
You let me down but I guess it's my fault,
Just throw me in that cold damp vault.

78878  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

Axe Murder
Running around in circles again,
Losing myself in all this pouring rain.
Can't think straight and I need to relax,
As I find somewhere to hide this bloody axe.
I made a mistake and now I'll regret,
Now your heartbeat lost it's way in all your sinful debt.

78877  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

An Even Murder
My hair is matted with your blood.
I hear your heartbeat so loud...thud...thud...thud...
The only way I could cut you out of my heart.
Was to give you, your greatest depart.
I know it's probably not what you wanted,
Forever in my dreams I'd be haunted.
And now I'm crying and screaming out in pain,
I cannot help but feel your love as you were slain.
I'm sorry I took your life,
And forever I'll treasure this bloodstained knife.
Just know within your last few deep breaths,
I was the one who would be responsible for these deaths.
And I could only love you in my lifetime.
Our bodies, to them, will be beautifully sublime.

78876  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-08-01
Written: (6449 days ago)

A Simple Hello
You kiss my lips in complete bliss.
A feeling I shall no longer miss.
I can't stand your lies,
Nor can I stand your decieving eyes.
That pierce my body like a knive.
When will your time to die arrive?
I promised you my heart,
And you pushed it away everytime you had to depart.
Leaving me to rot within my own soul,
My love was simply something you couldn't control.
You'll soon be back begging for another chance.
And I won't give in for that second sinful dance.
I'm over you and your cheating ways,
I'll go ahead and leave you in that foggy haze.
Smoke some more and forget I even exist,
Just pull up my sleeve and take a look at my wrist.
The scars can tell you all you need to know.
I'll try to forget that it was me who said hello.

 The logged in version 

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