[lyailahsmom]'s diary

112637  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2008-03-14
Written: (5895 days ago)

well today was a rough day already and it just started...last night was horrible, ive been putting a lot of stress on my self which leads to stress on the baby...i cant wait to have her so she dont get hurt by the stuff i do when i get mad or sad you know?...i try to controll it and hold my tears and anger in but sometimes i cant and it hurts me more and more to know that its hurting her..my angel..my love...my babygirl...my Lyailah:( im teribble
and no i dont deserve any pitty at all. but last night changed everything...my boyfriend broke up with me( were back together) just so he could still talk to his x and that really hurt because he always said he loved me more then hes ever loved anyone and he loves me more then anything& anyone in the world...but if he did then why would he leave me...and his about to be born baby and throw away our love and life together just so he could talk to her????....oviously hes still in love with her and dont love me as much as he says he does because nobody would chose an x over the one their with if they really do love them...so what would you think?? i dont know what to do anymore but ive got to let it go so i dont loose him...and because its whats best for the baby who i already love with all my heart..Lyailah Lynn Dowell

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