ESC penis score 2007
So... Skip everything about music, entertainment, statistics and artistic values. Let's ask the one who really decide where 50% of the votes go to: The penis!
It works like this: Imagine that you're having a hard on. Then that you're trying to phone and vote for song and see the reactions.
Not that ordered:
8 points because you can tell your friends that you like him without feeling ashamed, and you feel manly when your girlfriend calls him "cute". Definitely 12 if you're homosexual.
2 points! Gah! Reminds me when you were a little penis and thought vampires where cool and watched Buffy... Buffy... Mmmm... 12 points!
6 points - no reaction at all.
Cute girl. 8 points!
7 points. No one will think I like that even if I vote for it! Makes me feel manly to go my own way!
Girl rap! Yepp, I'm a (manly) feminist so I'll go for that! 8 points.
Cute girl! 10 points!
ESC Bosnia & Herzegovina
Ballads are for girls! 1 points. 10 points if you're having a girl there, because making girls happy is manly.
A boy? Boys are bad for penis! 1 points, unless you're homosexual: 7 points.
Yea! He's almost a tough as you! No problem! 10 points!
Turns on your gentleman side. OK, 8 points.
ESC Czech Republic
Heavy! Tough! And a little melody to impress the girls. 12 points and get me a girl so I can show how manly I am while voting!
Artistic? Penis ignores: 6 points.
8 point for the sexy dancers, but hearing a slimy guy singing about his girlproblems?!? Noooooo! 0 points! I don't know the gay-score for this, and I don't think I'll know...
ESC Cyprus Tough disco chick! Penis like, but... disco is gay, so 8 points. If you're gay then it's a not so fashionable girl, but it's disco so 8 points there too.
ESC Bosnia & Herzegovina Ballads are for girls! 1 points. 10 points if you're having a girl there, because making girls happy is manly.
ESC Ireland Same there.
ESC Armenia And again
ESC Albania Another ballad...
ESC Croatia It's enough with ballads now!!!
ESC Iceland Apparently not, but this guy looks cool, so +2 points for that!
ESC Lithuania And yet a ballad. Cute girl! +2.
ESC Georgia Cute girl: 8 points.
ESC Spain 0 points! Penis stops working after this! If you're gay: 0 points because you'll think of this next time you have sex!!! The horror!
ESC Ukraine I'm secure in my sexuality! No problem 8 points! If you're gay: 8 points, because it's not that cute.
ESC Andorra 4 points. It's too boyish, even if it's tough.
ESC Belarus 2 points! OK guy, but he's not tough enough! 0 points if you have a girlfriend there who thinks he's cute! Imagine that she thinks of him when you're having sex, and it's over...
ESC Estonia Tough girl! Probably wild in bed! Makes you feel like James Bond. 12 points !
ESC Hungary Blues?!? Depression isn't good for the penis! 1 points and let's forget about this!
ESC Latvia LALAAAA LAAAAAAAAAA! Penis likes opera. Makes me feel manly, even if it's a little gay. 8 points.
ESC Moldova Screaming bitch! 12 points!
ESC Portugal Penis died. 0 points.
ESC Serbia She reminds you of your mother! 0 points go away away now!!! 12 points if you're into mothers...
ESC Norway Old lady in sexy clothes!!! Gah! 0 points or 12 points if you like that. 6 points if you're gay.
ESC Germany 6 points as penis isn't listening and thinks that you could fantasize about some hot ladies from the 1930's instead.
ESC Malta 2 points - At least it's boring so that you can make up fantasies about something else.
ESC Denmark 0 points! Is it a he or a she? 8 points if you don't care about that.
ESC Finland Standard song, but though chick. 8 points. 12 points if you're a stalker who just love to hear "Leave me alone".
ESC United Kingdom 1 point for the hot girls in the video. Otherwise it's to embarrassing.
ESC the Netherlands 0 points! Penis will never accept that you vote for a boring standard schlager! 2 points if you're a schlager-gay kind of person.
ESC Belgium "Love power"?!? No way that pimp will teach you anything about love! 0 points unless you think that Micheal Jackson is hot or tough... Then maybe 8 points.
ESC France Jokes about France? Penis don't listen, give it 6 if you want.
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