Just licked ya
if either of the links dont work copy and paste it into the adress bar its really funny
'I object. I object to any killing at all. You
know, it's terrible what happened and I think retaliation
definitely makes sense and it's definitely one option. But,
personally, I prefer peace. You know, maybe I'm just being
ignorant and shortsighted, you know, it's true I'm not
running the government, I'm not running the United States. I
just don't think that killing people is a good way to remedy
people dying' - Tre Cool
'You can murder a murderer
but you can never murder murder itself' - Martin Luther King Jr.
30 things to do to piss your parents off
1. follow them around the house every where
2. moo when they say your name
3. run into walls
4. say that wearing clothes is against your religion
5. stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin and say"good morning sunshine
6. pluck someones hair out and yell "DNA!"
7. wear a sticker that says "im retarded"
8. have 20 imaginary friends that talk to you all the time
9. in public yell out" no mom/dad i will not make out with you!"
10. do what they actually tell you to do
11. jump off a roof trying to fly
12. hold there hand and whisper "i see dead people"
13. everything they say yell "liar!"
14. try to swim on the floor
15. tap on there door all night
16. pretend to have amnesia
17. say everything backwards
18. give yourself a swirly
19. run around with a lamp shade on your head screaming "the sun! its dying!"
20. sing at the top of your lungs while running around the house...in your underwear
21. have nervous spasms at spontaneus times
22. snort loudly when you laugh then laugh harder
23. run in circles
24. recite a whole movie 3 times
25. pretend to beat yourself up
26. slither evrywhere
27. wear you pants on your head and your shirt on your waist....tell them your making a fashion statement
28. try and drink out of a glass the wrong way
29. super glue your finger to your nose
30. talk to a pen
when im in a sobor mood i worry, work and think,
when im in a drunken mood i gamble, play and drink,
but when my moods are over and my time has come to pass,
i hope they bury me upside down so the world may kiss my ass!!
If you had me alone, locked up in your room for 24 hours, and I had to do whatever you wanted me to do, what would you do with me? Post this in your house. You might be surprised at the answers you get.
(leader) oh when the whites,(others) oh when the whites,(leader) go marching in,(others) go marching in,(both) oh when the whites go
marching in, i want to be in that
number, oh when the whites go marching
(leader) oh staffordshire,(others) oh staffordshire,(leader) is wonderfull,(others) is wonderfull,(both) oh staffordshire is
wonderfull, its full of t*ts, oakcakes and
vale, oh staffordshire is wonderfull.
Follow these rules to maintain your sanity
1. At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses
on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something,
ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in"
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone
has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors".
7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the
8. Don't use any punctuation marks
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they
11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape
of jungle sounds all day.
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend
their party because you're not in the mood.
16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name,
Rock Hard Devon.
17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!", "I won!"
"3rd time this week!!!!!"
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot,
yelling "run for your lives, they're loose!!"
19. Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are
going to have to let one of you go."
20. Put this in all of your profiles.
Sex is not the answer!
Sex is the question!!
Yes is the answer!!!
I wanna give you a hug but,
a hug leads to a kiss,
a kiss leads to a lick,
a lick leads to a suck,
and a suck leads to a fuck.