[Chemical Solitude]'s diary

56633  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-02-25
Written: (6845 days ago)


Month One
Mommy, I am only 8 inches long, but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it, I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.




Month Two
Mommy, today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me, you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.




Month Three
You know what mommy, I'm a girl!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too, and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.




Month Four
Mommy, my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine, but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes, and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.




Month Five
You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's an abortion?




Month Six
I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!




Month Seven
Mommy, I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. he is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me mommy?




Every Abortion Is Just...
One more heart that was stopped. Two more eyes that will never see. Two more hands that will never touch. Two more legs that will never run. One more mouth that will never speak.



.::If you're against abortion, repost this::.

45800  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-12-13
Written: (6919 days ago)


Fallen for your best friend? no
Made out with JUST a friend? no
Kissed the same sex? only on her ass!
Been rejected? not by a guy
Been in love? indeed
Been in lust? no
Used someone? no
Piercings? 3.. took my belly one out tho
Been used? most proly
Been cheated on? yes
Done something you regret? "No regrets" - Robbie Williams!
Considered a life of crime? no way
Considered being a hooker? haha woo but no
Considered being a pimp? no
Are you psycho? only on wednesdays
Split personalities? most proly
Obsessive? no
Racist? try not to be
Obsessive compulsive? no
Dream of dead bodies, blood, death, and gore? not lately
Dream of doing those things instead of just seeing them? no
Understanding? Try to be
Open-minded? i think so
Arrogant? no
Insecure? no
Interesting? i hope so.. not always tho
Hungry? LOL ALWAYS
Friendly? not to everyone!
Smart? i think so
Moody? arn't all pregnant people!
Childish? only when its appropriate
Independent? yes
Hard working? not really
Organized? im gettin there
Healthy? doubt it
Emotionally stable? most of the time
Shy? to start with
Difficult? haha maybe *wink wink*
Attractive? i dont think so!
Bored easily? yes!
Thirsty? not right now
Responsible? very
sad? nope
Happy? try to be
Trusting? unfortunatly a bit too much
Talkative? hehe yeah
Original? try to be
Lonely? No
Had a bad life? No not at all
Have a bad life? No, i have many friends & ppl that love me
Dye your hair? a bit too much:P
Floss daily? flossin is scary
Own a web cam? No
Ever get off the damn computer? I'm hardly on these days
Ever done a drug(s)? Yes.. would still but i hav a baby to consider now
Ever drank alcohol? Yes.. havnt and wont for a long time again tho
Suicidal? Have been in the past
Love some one you can't have? No, i've got the guy i love

30524  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-07-26
Written: (7058 days ago)

haha [Morals_Fading] has pics that i want...and i will get them...muahahahahaha

14141  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-04-30
Written: (7146 days ago)

GRR im so fucken pissed off atm...i had a painting in my room that i had done in a fit of anger...and it kinda turned out good...on it were the words from a seether song..."Fuck you for Killing me" ... so...i did what i do to most of my art...and i stuck it up on my wall...next thing i know...im being told to take it down cos its not appropriate...screw this i thought and left it there...im fucked if n e one is gona tell me what i can have hanging on my wall....then this morning i wake up to find it gone..............my fucked up dad has gone into MY room and taken something that I did...IT WAS MINE AND HE STOLE IT FROM ME.

My parents wona know why im so depressed all the time...yet they go and do something liek that...fucken steal from me. They did a pretty stupid thing right there. To me that ses that they dont want me expressing myself and my feelings...well if i cant do it through art...they'll soon find out i can do it other ways.

13953  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-04-27
Written: (7149 days ago)

wooooo...lol...had a pretty groove weekend...met this guy...huh hum...*whispers* he's a great kisser!!
n e way heres some things that were on my description but took up too much space...

yeap heres another one:
[X]Ever Been Drunk? Yeah
[X]Ever Smoked Pot? Ahuh
[X]Ever Kissed a Member of The Opposite Sex? Yes
[X]Ever Kiss A Member Of The Same Sex? Not sexually!
[X]Ever Crashed A Friend's Car? No
[X]Ever Had Anal Sex? ick...No
[X]Ever Been In Love? Yeah
[X]Ever Had Sex? me to know!
[X]Ever Had Sex In Public? See above!
[X]Ever Been Dumped? Yeah
[X]Ever Shop Lifted? Never have never will
[X]Ever Been Fired? Never had a job
[X]Ever Been In A Fist Fight? Yeah...with a DUde
[X]Ever Had A Threesome? Uhh no
[X]Ever Snuck Out Of Your Parents House? Yeah
[X]Ever Been Tied Up(Sexually)? No
[X]Ever Been Caught Masterbating? Lol no
[X]Ever Pissed On Myself? Prolly when i was little
[X]Ever Been Arrested? No
[X]Ever Made Out With A Stranger? yeah kinda
[X]Ever Stolen Something From My Job? No
[X]Ever Been On A Blind Date? Noh
[X]Ever Lied To A Friend? Yeah T_T
[X]Ever Had A Crush On A Teacher? ick...No
[X]Ever Skipped School? hah ... yeap
[X]Ever Been Sky Diving? Noo
[X]Ever Put My Pants On My Head Randomly?
Ofcorse
[X]Ever Walked In On Friends Having Sex? Just About!
[X]Ever Lied Just To Cover My Own Ass? Yeah
[X]Ever Cut Someone And Made Them Bleed? By accident!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I need : angel hair
I find : babies breath
I want : to be with someone
I have : so much i cant handle
I wish : i could be alone with someone
I hate : the way i feel right now
I fear : fear
I am : so not in the mood
I love : him *points*
I miss : being happy no matter what
I feel : so useless
I smell : gin...mmm
I hear : AFI - The leaving song part 2!
I know : i have to make a move
I crave : satisfaction
I should : stop screwing up
I search : the question, not the answer
I wonder : Why i feel so cheap and hollow
I regret : oh so much

BYE

13517  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-04-20
Written: (7155 days ago)

I think...im beginning to enjoy life...things are falling into place...its great *smiles*...but still old things linger...and they probably will for a while yet. All i can do is smile and try and work though them !! ^_^

13353  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-04-17
Written: (7159 days ago)

I don't know. Theres too many screwd up things happening right now. I dont know wether to be full of joy or lock myself in my room, turn some agressive music up and just sit back and watch blood trickly down my arm. Maybe ill just putt he two together and laugh as i scar my flesh. mmm.

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