[XNightFuckX]'s diary

16836  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-13
Written: (6598 days ago)

I listen to your song and I think of you and me
I remember how we held hands and how we used to live in our own world
Now im alone.. its not that bad but it feels weird and cold. Like the tears on my cheeks sliding down bringing back memories I promised I didn’t want to cry anymore never actually, but your love was the only thing holding back the tears now that its gone I can cry freely not worrying about you ever coming back now, I made sure of it, ill cry for as long as I can, your not here so now I can rest, put away all of my pretty cloths and put the makeup back. Ill take of the chain you gave me and throw the ring into the pile of junk that you gave me, if you cam came I would say to myself I would be happy once more ide jump on you and beg for you to hold me close ill want you to hold me ever so dear, even though you hurt me I don’t care I still want to love you, but your gone and people are telling me to get over it. But they don’t know what I felt when I was with you no one would ever feel that feeling that I had, it was special, but now its gone, is it to my ego we broke up to? Or was it the rumors? Or was it our misleading attitudes I don’t understand or remember how, but it was so suddenly it happened all so I quick I only said one word and you ran off crying, I hate it when anyone crys, ive been surrounded by that , I like it when people laugh and have smiles on the faces and talk, it makes me think there is good in the world and even though people have the most crapiest of lifes their still happy, but you, you also was upset I tried to make you happy but it was too hard you never said a word to me. I don’t know. Im confused man. Im here all upset bake twisted chest pained all cause I don’t have you or anyone here it kills me. Years will pass and ill still moarn for that one special person. It kills me that your gone now but ill get over it not you though but the fact that I don’t have anyone. Its hard but hey that’s life

16835  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-13
Written: (6598 days ago)

Sweet innocent words of a child
Oh purest of pure hearts guide and drive away all darkness
Is your heart filled with love?
Hope and care
Or will it be swallowed by the darkness
When all that will overcome will be selfishness
Despair and nothingness
But even
In the darkest of hearts there is a light, that light eventually glows
But only if something special or precious comes back
But then again that is how the darkness begins
When something precious like a person goes away
They urge to have it back and become greedy
Only the memory of their loss floats in their minds
But their heart can shine once more
If you try hard enough their will be another precious person or thing in your life
Believe in your heart
Believe in the precious memories
Make yourself shine like a thousand suns
And make your heart feel whole once more
Open your heart to the world
For in search of something even more beautiful
Things you haven’t even imagine is out there
Different worlds
Different places, it beacons to you and your heart for in search to make yourself whole
Even the tainted souls fine true happiness every now and then
Find your special someone and keep them and the memories close

16834  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-13
Written: (6598 days ago)

Don’t pay no mind to what they say about us
Just ignore those hopless people their all just beasts
You know they cant hurt you nor me
I love you so much that just the meir though of your soft lips makes me shudder
Your skin makes me cry
Your face makes me shy
Your heart makes me feel whole
Feel the beat of my heart touch me and feel the rush
Hear these words that I say
I love u everyday
No matter what they say
Ill always love you
Ask me what you want tell me what you want from me
Ill do anything to see that beautiful smile again
Lick my tears gone
Take my fears away
Love me till the never ending dawn
And take me till you sick of me
Im your drug and your mine
I wana look at you forever I want to be yours and love you for as long as I can
Nothing lasts for ever but lets cherish what we have now
Ill hold you close and take you in my arms
Ill whisper sweet words to you
I want to see you smile and laugh, I love it when you smile
Your so cute when your happy it takes away all of the evil form this world
When your happy it feels like the world is a better place.
Be mine for as long as you want

16833  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-13
Written: (6598 days ago)

Comin out with the truth into the harsh cold world
Saying what I feel and don’t care if im heard.
It has to be cause im with you
I grited my teeth for you
I went through rumors for you
But even the rats cant get to me
You gave my corage mouth to mouth
You went ahead and told me not to care.
Its true cause u only got one life. And I want to spend as much time as I can with you
Even if im foolish and not always seriouse but its either
You love me or hate me
But I know your love is tough
My moma can be mean but insane
My dads all kool even though he found everything out the hard way
But im putting my love for you on top
And im not going anywhere so you can get to know me.
Ima be here and you don’t need to cry
Ima be here and wipe away your tears.
Ima be here and take away the fears
Ima be here and ima always be near

16832  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-13
Written: (6598 days ago)

I weep every time when the thought of you not here with me occurs
It echoes through my mind your voice
That sweet angelic voice that calms me in the hardest of moments
My mind won’t leave me alone
Your image stays with me and all I can see is you, in my dreams
You’re a nightmare
You’re always there haunting me
I can’t tear away from you
You make my heart skip a beat when I hear your name and when I see you i'm in pure bliss
Just being near you is torture enough
The way you make me smile the way you make me laugh it makes my life a bit happier, but c’mon I know there has to be more to these simple conversations
I feel like i'm stuck in a room with no doors
I hit each corner with fierce force trying to find a way to get out; my emotions want to be set free
You’re my world that I have discovered
You made me belive in myself when everything was going down
You made me forget all the crazy shit
Because you live I live
Time is passing quick, don’t waist it, be with me for eternity
Be my personal nightmare!!

 The logged in version 

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