Ducky Valentine!

2013-02-28 [Schlachter]: This is the original by the way XD
<URL:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vgp10kiMSaQ>

2013-02-28 [Nekko fox]: I think the guitar player in that video should win this award.

2013-02-28 [Schlachter]: He's not making duck face though?

2013-02-28 [Schlachter]:
I will submit this duck face... beat that! Oppa Finland Style!

2013-02-28 [Nekko fox]: Ooh, that's tough to beat!

2013-02-28 [Schlachter]: Nearly impossible I would say... you would need to invent a new meme I think.
I stand corrected.

If you are into masochism(?)... google "the nikci menij show"...
<URL:http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6jrgfY6JI1qefw4fo1_500.gif>

2013-02-28 [Nekko fox]: Can you be disqualified if your face makes like a duck naturally? Because Nicki Minaj's face does that.

2013-02-28 [Schlachter]: Naturally? No, I think she has silicon in there. But why would that disqualify her? If she tried to make a duck face, there would be no face left... so my guess is, she would lose.

2013-03-01 [Nekko fox]: I suppose you're right.

2013-03-01 [Schlachter]: Wha... no!?
You're supposed to always disagree with me!
I will cry now :'(

2013-03-01 [Nekko fox]: You will NOT cry now.

2013-03-01 [Deg]: I WILL cry LATER?

2013-03-01 [Schlachter]: Yay! Lachrymology! I will cry myself a beach & swim in it!

2013-03-01 [Deg]: Alright, how do you cry yourself a BEACH? Much less SWIM in one? I swim in water, thank you very much.

2013-03-01 [Nekko fox]: Yes, crying oneself a beach implies there is land, presumably of sand, stone, shale, or dirt. I think crying a beach would be excruciating, and inevitably lead to blindness.

2013-03-01 [Schlachter]: Tears are more than 80% water though XD & it is salty. Yummy! Just like the sea! At least you KNOW the content of your tears though... the beach... euuuuch... better if you didn't XD.

Now, to cry yourself a beach, follow the simple algorithm below:
0. Build a waterproof perimeter large enough to contain your beach & seal it.
1. Start by making yourself comfortable...
2. Start thinking about all the times life has never been fair to you & if nothing, then imagine how it was like for some other people who had it worst than you while you were growing up. If nothing comes to mind, think about being born a black child in Africa having woken up one morning because your stomach is pulling your strings & some kind of parasitical worm is causing a large amount of pain in your foot & you don't remember having accomplished anything in your life so far because you have neither name nor family to direct you.
If still you can't relate... read this:
<URL:http://static.fjcdn.com/large/pictures/8f/56/8f5621_3782730.jpg>
If you do, imagine you are Clare, not Brandon. Brandon has it good now, he has suffered & known happiness -- there would be no point to him killing himself at this point. Clare has it coming to her in the least expected way... she will eventually reach the age of 35-40 or AIDS. Her kind are never enviable.
Or think about a Chinese mother who has no problem killing her child (imagine yourself that child & she your mother) because you were not a he (or a she if you are a he). Note that this would be before the technology of early gender detection was invented.
Or go to south-east Asia 200-300 years ago during the times of famine & you are obliged to eat one of your children to live... so you are faced with the option of exchanging children with one of your neighbors who is also starving to make things easier on yourself.
Or imagine you are stuck in a submarine in WWII, underneath 150 psi of water pressure (nearly 5 times the air pressure required to hold ONE of the tires in your car inflated) facing one of the most slowest & painful deaths -- anticipating it every moment if a single bolt in the hull or ballast of the machine were to shoot out & fracture due to the pressure. & you are the captain who must choose to go deeper & face ultimate compression to avoid the shells... or to surface and face mutilation & the possibility of drowning anyways if the submarine collapses before that. (there is a movie on that called "Das Boot" which does a mildly good job of conveying this feeling)
2. You should have enough of a hold on the kinds of injustices the world is faced with as a result of modern greed.
3. You should now be immersed in your own personal beach :) like black magic =D.

Alternatively... skip the above & just take a quick glance at a Justin Bieber music video. It should achieve the same results XD

2013-03-01 [Schlachter]: Apparently, before Jude... his father Job needed none of these things to cry himself blind. I am sure there are other examples in history. But of course, at least if you remember to SEAL a perimeter, you get a beach for free =D!

2013-03-01 [Nekko fox]: Free beaches! Hell, in the U.S., beaches are usually, like, a dollar! SOMETIMES TWO!

2013-03-01 [Schlachter]: That's just stupid! Europe has lots of free beaches. Let's all go to Spain & Greece. They might be nude & you might get "cold sores", but who cares... just keep the kids with the sleep goggles(?) from the plane & give them iPhones -- who needs to swim when you have one of those XD?

But I should patent my algorithm XD the U.S. will soon be one big beach completely underwater. By U.S. I mean California... or... meh forget it...

2013-03-01 [Nekko fox]: No no...please continue.

2013-03-01 [Schlachter]: ... well, if you insist...
If you must really know, the polar ice caps are melting; & fast. A lot of landmass is going to end up underwater. This will conversely affect the weather -- I mean everyone has noticed, no one will deny it. There used to be a clear-cut difference between the seasons... now there just isn't. Even in places where there is just one or two seasons.

I vote underwater cities. But by then I'm pretty sure the U.S. will be trading not with the U.S. dollar but packs of South American branded cigarettes. You might even get whites move further up to Canada... it would be a shame to leave all those American resources down there though. But I doubt the local population would accept that or would not notice it... but then again... nah, no point at all...