what breed of music are you?
You scored as a metal

metal : 95% 
grunge : 70% 
classic rock : 40% 
reggae : 40% 
Emo : 40% 
Pop Punk : 30% 
Punk : 20% 
mainstream rock : 10% 
ska : 0% 
rap : 0% 
Indie : 0% 
industrial : 0% 
Pop : 0% 
country : 0% 

-----///\\-----Plz
----///-\\\----Put This
---|||---|||---On Your
---|||---|||---account If
---|||---|||---You Know
----\\\-///----Someone
-----\\///-----Who Died
------///\-----Of
-----///\\\----Cancer
----///--\\\


His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books.
I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a
Friday?
He must really be a nerd." I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my
friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him.
They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping
him so he landed in the dirt.
His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten
feet from him.
He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went
out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking
for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.
As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. " They
really should get lives." He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!"
There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that
showed real gratitude. I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.
As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen
him before. He said he had gone to private school before now.
I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked
all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be
a pretty cool kid.
I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He
said yes.
We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I
liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books
again.
I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious
muscles with this pile of books everyday! He just laughed and handed me
half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.
When we were seniors, we began to think about college. Kyle decided on
Georgetown, and I was going to Duke.
I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a
problem.
He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football
scholarship.
Kyle was valedictorian of our class.?I teased him all the time about
being a nerd.
He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me
having to get up there and speak
Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those guys
that really found himself during high school.
He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates
than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.?I could see that he was nervous about his
speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll
be great!"
He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and
smiled. " Thanks," he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began "Graduation
is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough
years.
Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly
your friends...
I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best
gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story."
I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the
first day we met.
He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.
He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have
to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.?"Thankfully, I was
saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."
I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy
told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful
smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture
you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. This story is to make you remember that everyone is real, Geek or sportsman, they deserve a chance and a friend!


To the citizens of the United States of America:

In light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. Her Sovereign Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories (excepting Kansas, which she does not fancy).

Your new prime minister, Tony Blair, will appoint a governor for America without the need for further elections.

Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium," and check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour', 'favour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the suffix "ise."
You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra'; you may elect to respell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you find you simply can't cope with correct pronunciation.

Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels (look up "vocabulary"). Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.

2. There is no such thing as "US English." We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of "-ize."

3. You will relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out Task #1 (see above).

4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but to be celebrated only in England. It will be called "Come-Uppance Day."

5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.

6. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

7. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and this is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric immediately and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

8. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling "gasoline") -roughly $12/US gallon. Get used to it.

9. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with mayonnaise but with vinegar.

10. Waiters and waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

11. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer," and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as "Lager." American brands will be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine," so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

12. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialogue in "Four Weddings and a Funeral" was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

13. You will cease playing American "football." There is only one kind of proper football; you call it "soccer." Those of you brave enough will, in time, will be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).

Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the "World Series" for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable.

14. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

15. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due backdated to 1776.

Thank you for your co-operation.

John Cleese


THINGS GUYS WANT GIRLS TO KNOW

1. We're not as perverted as you think we all are.

2. No matter what YOU say, your ex-boyfriend IS a LOSER.

3. We like you to give us hugs and kisses sometimes too.

4. Don't argue with us when we call you beautiful.

5. Don't treat us like crap, what goes around comes around.

6. We know you're pretty, that's one of the reason's we're going out with you.

7. Don't go into detail about your period. It scares us.

8. If you have cramps and we ask you what's wrong, just tell us it's that time of the month and nothing more.

9. If you really liked us for us, you would let us think that our mustache, beard, or sideburns looked cool.

10. We never shave our legs. So get over it.

11. NEVER ask us if you can put makeup on us. It's just wrong............

12. Don't make bets about us, because one of your friends will tell us, if you don't.

13. When we tell you that you're not fat, believe us.

14. We absolutely do not care about the Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, 98 Degrees, or what any other guy looks like for that matter.

15. We may not be able to pee accurately all of the time, but at least we can stand up and go pee.

16. Just cause you think you're always right, doesn't mean that you don't have to apologize when you do something "wrong."

17. You expect us to say and do sweet things for you, but it would be nice if you did the same every once in a while. We like to know that you love us.

18. We can't always be spontaneous, so try to help us make the plans sometimes.

19. Don't ask us to beat up another guy for you, cause you might get what you wish for.

20. Never kick us in the nuts "just to see what we would say". That's just mean.

21. Never pretend like you are going to break up with us and laugh when we believe you.

22. Pamela Anderson's boobs aren't fake anymore, but we like yours better anyway.

23. Size doesn't matter, except to idiots who don't want a relationship

24. PMS is not an excuse.

25. If you want us to put the seat down when we're done, you should put it up when you're done.

26. Don't tell us how cute your ex-boyfriend was. That doesn't turn us on.

27. And always remember: The way to a guy’s heart is through his stomach..... And maybe.... oh never mind.

28. NEVER ask us to kiss other guys. You might be that comfy with your friends, but to us it's just wrong.

29. We always notice how funny it is after you rip out our heart, stick it down our throat and still want to be friends.

30. We know you're not always right, but we'll pretend like you are anyway

31. And last but not least: If your fighting a guy and your winning no matter how much you say it HE is still letting you win!