Im 19 i grew up in kalamazoo Mi went to gull lake high and got into some shit now im chilling in ohio. im in good shape i working out almost every day. i like chillin wit my family and freinds i like books movies and staying clean

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C. The Russians used a pencil.



Ladies always bitch and bitch to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies next time you're bitching, maybe look up to see who you're bitching to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

     Denis Leary's Quotation:
"Most people think life sucks, and then you die. Not me. I beg to differ. I think life sucks, then you get cancer, then your dog dies, your wife leaves you, the cancer goes into remission, you get a new dog, you get remarried, you owe ten million dollars in medical bills but you work hard for thirty-five years and you pay it back and then -- one day -- you have a massive stroke, your whole right side is paralyzed, you have to limp along the streets and speak out of the left side of your mouth and drool but you go into rehabilitation and regain the power to walk and the power to talk and then -- one day -- you step off a curb at Sixty-seventh Street, and BANG you get hit by a city bus and then you die. Maybe."

Fuck

Prehaps one of the most interesting words
In the English language today is the word fuck
Out of all the English words that begin with the letter "f"
Fuck is the only word that is referred to as the "f"word
It's the one magical word
Just by it's sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love
Fuck, as most words in the English language, is derived for German
the word "fleckin" which means to strike
In English fuck falls into many grammatical categories
As a transitive verb for instance
"John fucked Shirley."
As an intransitive verb
"Shirley fucks."
It's meanings not always sexual
It can be used as an adjective as in
"John's doing all the fucking work."
As an adverb
"Shirley talks too fucking much."
As an adverb enhancing an adjective
"Shirley is fucking beautiful!"
As a noun
"I don't give a fuck!"
As a part of a word
"Absofuckinglutly!"
or
"Infuckincredible!"
And as almost every word in the sentence
"Fuck the fucking fuckers."
But you must realize that aren't too many words
With the versatility of fuck
As in these examples describing situations such as
Fraud
"I got fucked at the used car lot."
Dismay
"Ah fuck it!"
Trouble
"I guess I'm really fucked now."
Aggression
"Don't fuck with me buddy"
Difficulty
"I don't understand this fucking question"
Inquiry
"Who the fuck was that?"
Disatisfaction
"I don't like what the fuck is going on here."
Incompetantce
"He's a fuck off"
Dismissal
"What don't you go outside and play hide-and-go fuck yourself?"
I'm sure you can think of many more examples
With all of these multipurpose applications
How can anyone be at a fuckin loss for words

Death

I'm sick and tired of my generation getting blamed for the state of the planet. I'm sick of my generation getting called the TV generation. "Well all you guys do is watch TV." What did you expect!? We watched Lee Harvey Oswald get shot live on TV one Sunday morning, we were afraid to change the fucking channel for the next thirty years. "This show sucks." "Yeah, but somebody might get shot during the commercial. Now hang on!"

That's what's wrong with this country. We always shoot the wrong guys. We shoot JFK, we shoot RFK, and it comes to Teddy, we go, "Ahh, leave him alone. He'll fuck it up himself, no problem. You know?" Biggest target in the whole God damn Kennedy family. He weighs about seven thousand pounds. You could shoot a bullet in Los Angeles and hit him in the ass in Boston five minutes later. He'd be standing on the lawn at the Kennedy compound going, "Ah Ah Ah Ah There's a bullet in my ass. Ah Ah ah ah"

Ted Kennedy. Good senator, but a bad date. You know what I'm saying, folks? One of those guys who gets home at four o'clock in the morning and goes, "What did I forget? Oh! The fucking girl! What's the matter with me? Jesus, where are my pants!? Holy shit!"

Because I'll tell you folks. We got a real problem with guns in this country. We have people snapping almost twice, three, four, five times a year. Right? People just snap. They can't take it anymore. They just snap, they go into McDonalds and kill fifteen people. I mean what the fuck is going on down at the post office? Every six months some guy gets fired, comes back and kills all his co-workers. If I worked at the post office as a supervisor, I wouldn't lay anybody off for the next twenty-five fucking years. I'd just walk around going, "Hanrahan, what're you doing?" "Nothing." "Well, keep it up, you're doing a great job! Jesus. I'll tell ya."

And I am sick and tired for New York City taking the blame for the crime problem. You know, whenever you read a fact chart, it always says Detroit leads the world in rape and murder and everything else, but New York takes the blame. "New York's a cess pool. It's a cess pool of filth and crime. We're moving."

Hey! I just moved here four years ago, and I'm not leaving, because this is the most exciting place in the world to live. Oh yeah! Yeah! There are so many ways to die in New York City, come on! Race riots, drive by shootings, subway crashes, construction cranes collapsing on the sidewalks, manhole covers blowing up, asbestos shooting into the sky.

We had a subway crash here a couple of years ago. Five people died. The next day they found the driver was drunk and hooked on crack. Folks, this makes Disneyland look like a fucking bike ride, doesn't it? "Your drive today is Edward. He's drunk and hooked on crack. The man sitting next to you has a loaded nine-millimeter. Good luck, folks!" "Honey, get the camera! This is gonna be fucking great!"

Yeah, I love living in New York, man, and people who live in New York, we wear that fact like a badge right on our sleeve because we know that fact impresses everybody! "I was in Vietnam." "So what? I live in New York!" "Really?"

Yeah, because new york teaches you to live life the way it should be lived. Moment to moment. Yes, because every moment in New York could be your last. Oh yeah, yeah. You could be walking down the street tomorrow, feeling good about yourself, drink free, drug free, looking forward to the future and somebody accidently nudges their poodle off of a 75th floor ledge. Doink! And he's headed for the ground at a hundred and seventy five thousand miles per hour. And curchunk he's impeded in your head! You're dead on contact. The headline in the Post the next day reads, "Man killed by best friend." People cut the article out and they laugh about it at the office and you're forever remembered as the poodle man! "I knew the poodle man and he hated fucking poodles."

New York teaches you to live life moment to moment and street by street and beat to beat. Because we've all played that street game in New York, haven't we? Yes we have. Good block. Bad block. Ooooh. Good block. Bad block. OoooOoooh. Gun block. Crack block. OoooOoooh. Asbestos block. Poodle block! Poodle block!

Because most people think, "Life sucks, and then you die." I disagree. I think life sucks, then you get cancer. Then you go into chemotherapy. You lose all your hair, you feel bad about yourself. Then all of the sudden the cancer goes into remission. You look good you feel good, you're going great, and all of the sudden you have a stroke. You can't move your right side. And one day you step off the curb at 68th by Lincoln Center and bang, you get hit by a bus. And then, maybe, you die.

Because I think Jim Hensen said it best when he said, "Anybody got any aspirin? I think I got a cold." And a chill filled the room. We all have this incredible attachment to the Muppets, don't we? "We love the muppets! They're so cute!" Did you hear about Jim Hensen's funeral? Here in New York City, huh? Kermit the frog and Big Bird sang "It's not easy being green" at Jim Hensen's funeral. If I'm fifty-six years old when I kick the bucket and a fucking sock is singing at my funeral, I'm gonna pop out of the coffin and go, "Hey! What the hell is this about? Sammy Davis Jr. gets Frank Sinatra, and I get a fucking sock!? I'm really pissed off now!"

Traditional Irish Folk Song

They come over here
And they take all our land
They chop off our heads
And they boil them in oil
Our children are leaving
And we have no heads
We drink and we sing
And we drink and we die

We have no heads
We have no heads

They come over here
And they chop off our legs
They cut off our hands
And put nails in our eyes
O'Grady is dead
And O'Hanrahan's gone
We drink and we die
And continue to drink

O'Hanrahan
No O'Hanrahan

They buried O'Neil
Down in country Shillhame
The poor children crying
And fe dee din de
Hin fle di dinfle
Di din fle de din de
In hey bibble bibble
Hey bibble bibble
Hey fle bibble de

O'Hanrahan
No O'Hanrahan

We drink and we sing
And we drink and we sing
Hey!

We drink and we drive
And we puke and we drink
Hey!

We drink and we fight
And we bleed and we cry
Hey!

We puke and we smoke
And we drink and we die
Hey!