Joke from [Avrora_Black]

There are two men sitting at a bar late at night. One of them looks over to the other. "Hey... um... so where are you from?"
And the other man answers, "I'm from Ireland"
"No kidding? I'm from Ireland too! Let's drink to that! To Ireland!"
"To Ireland" says the second man and they drink a beer.

After a minute the second man looks to the other and asks:
"So...from which part of Ireland are you from exactly?"
"I'm from Dublin"
"I'm from Dublin too! Let's drink to that!"
"To Dublin!" and they drink another beer.

Some minutes after that one of them asks:
"Where do you study?"
"I study at Dublin university"
"No, really?! I study there too! To Dublin university!"
"To Dublin university" and they empty another two beer bottles.

A third man enters the bar and asks the bartender:
"Hey Jimmy, what's up? Anything new?"
And the bartender answers,
"No, not really. The McDonald twins are drunk again"

Today's joke is from [-Astonish-]

One day during math class, the teacher asks Billy a question.
Teacher: "Billy, if 4 crows are sitting on a fence, and the farmer shoots one, how many are left?"
Billy: "Zero"
Teacher: "No Billy, I don't think you understand. There are FOUR crows and only ONE gets shot. So how many are left?"
Billy: "Zero"
Teacher (very frustrated): "And why are all the crows gone?"
Billy: "One gets shot and the other ones get scared and fly away"
Teacher: "That's incorrect, but I like the way you think"
Billy: "May I ask you a question?"
Teacher: "Yes."
Billy: "There are three women in a candy store. One is licking her lollipop, one is sucking her lollipop, and one is biting her lollipop. Which one is married?"
Teacher: "The one sucking her lollipop."
Billy: "Actually, it's the one with the wedding ring, but I like the way you think"

Joke from [The Darkest Star.]

Q. What kind of bees make milk?
A. Boo-bees! o.O;

Joke told by [Shaneyphoo]

Three construction workers are on top of a building. The first one opens his lunch to find that he has chicken on his sandwich. "If i get chicken tomorrow for lunch i will jump off this building and kill myself!" he said.

The next man opens his lunch to find he has pork on his sandwitch so he says

"If I get pork tomorrow for lunch I will jump off this building and kill myself!"

Finally, the last man opens his lunch to find that he has beef on it so he also says
"If i get beef tomorrow for lunch I will jump off this building and kill my self"

The next day at lunch time, the first man opens his lunch to find that he has chicken. As he said he jumps off the building and kills himself. The second man opens his lunch to find that he has pork and he also jumps. Finally the third man opens his lunch to find that he has beef so he joins the other men and kills himself.

At the funaral of the men the wives are talking together. The wife of the first man says

"I thought he loved chicken! He never complained before"

The wife of the second man cries "Why did I have to make him pork?" They both look at the third wife listening for her excuse.

"Well don't look at me! He made his own lunch."