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Beetle Geuse (Get better soon Loserface ^^)

Member #48967 created: 2007-07-20 17:32:54Simple URL: http://www.elfpack.com/48967   

Name: Joe Wize

photo

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Elfpack titles and orders
Drunk-assAdventurerSex-monster
Crazy kid

Treasury Inventory:
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This is my pet: People-Eater: The Sea Slug
Giffie-Pet Store

Description:
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<img500*0:stuff/aj/48967/1258356106.jpg>
<img:stuff/aj/48967/1258356131.jpg><img500*0:stuff/aj/48967/1258356173.jpg><img:stuff/aj/48967/1258356191.jpg><img500*0:stuff/aj/48967/1258356233.jpg>           
12 REASONS TO FUCK A DANCER

1. We know all the positions.
2. We have perfect technique,good rhythm,and great hip rotation.
3. We're used to having bruises on our knees.
4. We're used to performing in minimal amounts of clothing.
5. We're perfectionists: we keep going until we hit it.
6. After a short intermission, we're ready to go at it again.
7. We don't mind getting hot and sweaty.
8. We are used to performing in front of large audiences.
9.Our moves are perfectly choreographed.
10. We do it in front of mirrors.
11.We can perform multiple times a day.
12.One word..FLEXIBILITY !!



Did You Know?
----------------------------------------

1) Having sex 3 times a week for 1 year adds up to running 75 miles!!!!


2) having sex increases the amount cortisol and adrenaline in your brain inturn making you smarter. so getting fucked on test day is actually a good thing!!


Statements about sex:

1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth.


2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis,skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow.


3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.


4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!


5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.


6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones.These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!


7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.


8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.


9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.


10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.


So now you know...if they ever ask you which sport is healthiest, you know which one and why!!;)
                       sex is evil evil is sin sin is forgiven...so stick it in ^^                                                     ok um im cool i geuss ... im smarter than id like to admit but its ok because im a complete jackass so dont worry when ya meet me i dont bite...well im lieing yes i do ^^

happy, happy
joy, joy
i'm a kinky sex toy
beat me, bite me
make me bleed
kinky sex is what i need.

SEX IS A SENSATION
CAUSED BY TEMPTATION
WHEN A GUY STICKS HIS LOCATION
INTO A GIRLS DESTINATION
TO INCREASE POPULATION
FOR THE NEXT GENERATION
YOU GET MY EXPLANATION
OR DO U NEED A DEMONSTRATION?

I wanna give you a HUG but,
a Hug leads to a KISS,
A KISS leads to a LICK,
a LICK leads to a SUCK,
and a SUCK leads to a FUCK...^^
Hmmmmmmmm..........WANNA HUG!!!!????



A white man yells to a black man. "Hey colored boy! You're blockin my view."
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black"
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this in your house if you are against racism.







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........................ ‘’~-,,-~ Help stewie rule the world! copy and paste on your house. DAMN YOU ALL!
****If you had me alone, locked up in your room for 24 hours, and I had to do whatever you wanted me to do, what would you do with me?

OHH YEAA
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Little miss muffet sat on a tuffet smoking a joint in the dark
Then along came a spider and sat down beside her saying "YOUR BUSTED BITCH IM A NARK"


Peace, pot, tequila shot,
women love me stoned or not.
Sex,drugs, rock & roll,
speed, weed, birth control.
Lifes a bitch, then you die,
fuck the world lets get high.
We are stonerz we have class,
Fuck with us we’ll kick your ass.
So to all your preps who think your cool,
SUCK A DICK stonerz rule.



Roll, roll, roll, your joint,
twist it at the ends.
Light it up, take a puff,
pass it to a friend.



Roll roll roll a joint
Pass it down the line,
Take a toke
Breathe the smoke
it'll blow your fuckin' mind.




Weed is a plant
That grows in the ground,
If God didn't want it
It wouldn't be found.
So all of you pussies
That don't get high,
SHUT THE FUCK UP,
and give it a try!!!!!!!!!!




This is my blunt,
This is my bowl,
I love smoking joints,
Cuz i know how to roll.
Roses are red,
And my bud is green
I love getting high
If you know what i mean.
I was just there,
But now I am not,
Cuz i went away,
To go smoke some pot.
I wrote all this down
To prove one little point
Life's just a bitch,
When you don't got a joint!



Stonerz live, and stonerz die,
but in the end we all get high.
So if at first you don’t succeed,
fuck the world and smoke some weed



Lifes a bitch
and then you die
so fuck the world
and lets get HIGH!!!
-
Im a stoner
proud and true
i grow my weed
and smoke it too.
-
so all you preps
that think your cool
FUCK YOURSELVES!!!
cuz stoners rule!!


Age: 26Year of birth: 1987Month of birth: 5Day of birth: 24

Gender: male

What do you do?: Something in between

Exact place of living: The Fort

Known languages
Sign Language

Elfpack crew wannabe: Yes

Music
alternativebluesgoth
heavy metalnew ageprogressive metal
punkraprock

Other interests
animebeerchasing the preferred sex
chessdancingdrinks
fantasyhuntingmotorcycles
role playingsingingsmoking
whisky

Civil status: single

Sexual preference: opposite sex

Body shape: muscular

Height: 185


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